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Embracing the Challenge of Life with Epilepsy

This article is not about epilepsy per se. It is instead about the challenges that people with epilepsy and their families successfully manage each and every day.

For the record, epilepsy is not a mental illness. It is not a sign of low intelligence. It is not contagious. It is a brain disorder in which brain cells create abnormal electrical impulses that cause seizures. During a seizure, a person might have muscle spasms, a temporary loss of consciousness, a period of confusion, a staring spell, or a sudden need to sleep. Unless they take medication to control them (and, unfortunately, even sometimes when they do), people with epilepsy are prone to experiencing seizures on a frequent basis.

Because seizure activity can be unpredictable and dramatic, people with epilepsy can become quite fearful of being out in public. Even if a person has had only a few seizures, he or she may live in fear that it will happen again. To avoid the possible embarrassment of having a seizure in a social situation, many people avoid social situations all together. They become increasingly isolated, lonely, and even depressed. Their lives become organized around their fear that they will have a seizure and their efforts to avoid this possibility.

But living with epilepsy does not inevitably lead to depression, dependency, and isolation.

Not Adversity, but Advocacy

Like all of life’s challenges, epilepsy can be handled as a tragedy, or as a problem to be solved. Epilepsy doesn’t have to mean the end of “normal” life. People with epilepsy can find love, friendship, employment, hobbies and meaning just like everybody else. But to do so requires a “can-do” spirit and a willingness to work with the problem instead of running away from it.

Consider Joan, age 52. Joan has frequent, intense seizures, sometimes as many as a dozen a day. During a seizure, she loses awareness of her surroundings and might collapse to the floor. More often, she simply looks for a place to rest and goes into what looks like a deep sleep for a few minutes. She is then able to resume what she is doing.

Many people would limit their lives considerably in the face of such obstacles. Not Joan. Her family taught her early to expect the most from herself and not to let her seizures prevent her from doing things she wants to do. By nature an optimistic and stubborn person, she decided at a young age that her parents were right. She married her college sweetheart and the two of them have adapted their living situation to accommodate her condition.

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Since she doesn’t drive, they chose to live in the center of a town where bus service is reliable and where most of the stores and services she needs are within walking distance. When she found that she couldn’t manage the demands of a fulltime job, she went to school to learn the bookkeeping skills needed to join her husband’s business. As her husband’s partner, she can work around her seizures. He credits a large part of their success to her financial wizardry.

Joan also is active in several local civic organizations and has used her own situation to educate people about epilepsy and what to do if someone has a seizure. She is such a successful advocate for herself that when she recently had a significant seizure during an awards ceremony at one of these organizations, the president simply announced, “Joan is having a seizure now but she’ll be back with us soon.” A group of people made a circle around her to give her some privacy while she came around and the ceremony went forward without incident.

Embracing the Challenge of Life with Epilepsy

Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D.

Marie Hartwell-WalkerDr. Marie Hartwell-Walker is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. She writes regularly for Psych Central as well as Psych Central's Ask the Therapist feature. She is author of the insightful parenting e-book, Tending the Family Heart.

Check out her book, Unlocking the Secrets of Self-Esteem.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, M. (2020). Embracing the Challenge of Life with Epilepsy. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 4, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 14 Jan 2020 (Originally: 17 May 2016)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 14 Jan 2020
Published on Psych All rights reserved.