Therapist Grief
As a therapist, many people come in with issues with grief. For years I have tried to help clients figure out the well know Elisabeth Kubler Ross Stages of Grief and what stage in their grief they are in: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. It has been sad to watch clients suffer and deal with grief. I have wished many times that I could...
When Procrastination is Persistent, Pervasive and Pointless
Sure we all procrastinate sometimes. Why not? Let’s see, shall I spend the evening doing mind-numbing clean-up chores or enjoy a good time with my friends? Shall I do tedious paperwork or plop down on the couch and watch my favorite show? It’s never been easy to control our urges, especially when what we “should” be doing goes against our grain.
In the digital world, however, procrastination is even harder to conquer. Accessible, appealing, addictive distractions are everywhere. Beepers beckon. Entertainment entices. Digital devices ding. Social networks seduce. Gaming, blogging, chat rooms, You-Tube, video streaming -- and more -- easily lead us astray. Digital temptations are just so much more seductive. Exciting, fast-paced entertainment actually changes the way our brains operate. If a task doesn’t immediately hold our interest, our minds gravitate to other matters.
In the digital world, however, procrastination is even harder to conquer. Accessible, appealing, addictive distractions are everywhere. Beepers beckon. Entertainment entices. Digital devices ding. Social networks seduce. Gaming, blogging, chat rooms, You-Tube, video streaming -- and more -- easily lead us astray. Digital temptations are just so much more seductive. Exciting, fast-paced entertainment actually changes the way our brains operate. If a task doesn’t immediately hold our interest, our minds gravitate to other matters.
Here’s How to Stop Being a Prisoner of Regret
"We are products of our past, but we don’t have to be prisoners of it." -- Rick Warren
Regret -- whether for things that you have done or things that you had no control over -- can keep you frozen in the past, unable to move forward. Sadly, there are no magic wands that can turn back the hands of time and change what has happened, but despite this I believe we’re not entirely powerless to affect the past, after all.
Regret -- whether for things that you have done or things that you had no control over -- can keep you frozen in the past, unable to move forward. Sadly, there are no magic wands that can turn back the hands of time and change what has happened, but despite this I believe we’re not entirely powerless to affect the past, after all.
Internet Therapy for Children with OCD
Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is condition that affects about 2.2 million Americans and 750,000 people in the UK. It has two key features: thoughts that repeat themselves over and over again (called obsessive thoughts) and feeling that the person must do certain actions repeatedly (compulsions). The person thinks the thoughts are silly, but they cannot stop them. Sometimes only carrying out the actions stops the thoughts for a while. The typical example is thinking that your hands are dirty, even though you know they are not, and having to wash them repeatedly. The person can spend a huge chunk of the day carrying out these compulsions. This often makes it very difficult to function at all. This can be even more tragic when it affects a child.
IMAlive: A Global Crisis Chat Service
IMAlive.org is an online crisis counseling service that uses an instant message (IM) chat interface instead of phone or SMS texting.
I maintain Online Suicide Help, a global directory of services which are usually restricted to one country or even one small town. This has meant that most countries in the world could not access any services. Recently I learned that IMAlive changed its service area from US and Canada to be the first crisis chat service available worldwide, and I emailed to find out more about this change. John Plonski, IMAlive's Director of Training and Developer of its Helping Empathically As Responders Training (HEART) program, kindly wrote back to share more.
I maintain Online Suicide Help, a global directory of services which are usually restricted to one country or even one small town. This has meant that most countries in the world could not access any services. Recently I learned that IMAlive changed its service area from US and Canada to be the first crisis chat service available worldwide, and I emailed to find out more about this change. John Plonski, IMAlive's Director of Training and Developer of its Helping Empathically As Responders Training (HEART) program, kindly wrote back to share more.
Learn How to Stop Being Your Own Worst Critic
How to tune out self-doubt.
When we summon the courage to take a risk or make a change, we often encounter fear and a little voice that talks trash.
"You won’t be good at it. Don’t try it. You’ll fail anyway. It’s not worth the humiliation. Try again later. It won’t be good enough. Everyone will laugh at you."
That is your inner critic talking. Does it sound familiar?
How to Be Honest with Yourself
“When compassion awakens in your heart, you’re able to be more honest with yourself.” – Mingyur Rinpoche
Do you lie to yourself? Maybe just a little? Maybe a lot? Whatever the answer, you’re not alone. Most people tell lies, rationalize at times, trying to reassure themselves with a self-talk that’s more wishful thinking or revisionist in nature than actual truth.
Sometimes, that’s not all bad. If you need to embroider what happened with a brighter colored thread to get past it, maybe that’s healthy.
Do you lie to yourself? Maybe just a little? Maybe a lot? Whatever the answer, you’re not alone. Most people tell lies, rationalize at times, trying to reassure themselves with a self-talk that’s more wishful thinking or revisionist in nature than actual truth.
Sometimes, that’s not all bad. If you need to embroider what happened with a brighter colored thread to get past it, maybe that’s healthy.
Psychology Around the Net: August 19, 2017
Happy Saturday, sweet readers!
Guess what? I'm going "off the grid" this weekend. Well, maybe not in the strictest of senses (I'll still have my computer and phone) but in the sense that...well, let's just say I've been neglecting my own personal interests -- things I enjoy and feel help my personal growth -- and it's hurting my mental health. I feel unfulfilled. I have to figure out a way to stop that.
Starting today.
What if You Suspect Emotional Infidelity?
Emotional infidelity can be as heartbreaking for the betrayed partner as a physical affair. Sometimes it’s hard to know what’s going on when your spouse assures you that a relationship with a friend, coworker, or social media acquaintance is innocent. But if...
Feeling Scattered
When I sat down to write this article, I was completely focused on what I wanted to accomplish. Now, here it is, just 20 minutes later, and I’m feeling scattered and unfocused.
What happened?
An “urgent” text pinged, saddling me with another task I must accomplish by the end of the day.
My cleaning crew arrived, late again, and the noise from the vacuum cleaner is making it impossible for me to concentrate.
Then, my next client called. She was close by; could we possibly start the session earlier?
What happened?
An “urgent” text pinged, saddling me with another task I must accomplish by the end of the day.
My cleaning crew arrived, late again, and the noise from the vacuum cleaner is making it impossible for me to concentrate.
Then, my next client called. She was close by; could we possibly start the session earlier?
The Ties Between Crime and Malignant Narcissism
What do Jim Jones, OJ Simpson, and Ted Bundy all have in common? They were charismatic, charming, and had the ability to influence almost anyone. They also demonstrated specific characteristics associated with malignant narcissism.
Malignant narcissism is known as a mixture of narcissism and antisocial personality disorder. They lack empathy and often live in grandiose fantasies that compete with reality. If the fantasies are revealed as such, the afflicted person may become hostile with high levels of rage.
Malignant narcissism is not an individual diagnosis in the DSM, rather it is a subset of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. As well as having symptoms of a Narcissistic Personality Disorder, a person with malignant narcissism also displays paranoia.
Malignant narcissism is known as a mixture of narcissism and antisocial personality disorder. They lack empathy and often live in grandiose fantasies that compete with reality. If the fantasies are revealed as such, the afflicted person may become hostile with high levels of rage.
Malignant narcissism is not an individual diagnosis in the DSM, rather it is a subset of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. As well as having symptoms of a Narcissistic Personality Disorder, a person with malignant narcissism also displays paranoia.
Best of Our Blogs: August 18, 2017
Many of us are living our hell. We feel trapped, imprisoned, and unhappy by circumstances we have no control over.
Maybe we're unemployed or stuck in a relationship, job or state that we can't stand. When I feel this way, I think of Holocaust survivor Viktor E. Frankl and his life changing book, Man's Search for Meaning.
While we sometimes can't move, we have a choice to change our thinking. We can find ways even in an intolerable state to find meaning, power and even joy.
This week, we learn that an inspiring quote, changing our thoughts and understanding our partners can make a difference in how free we feel in our lives.
Maybe we're unemployed or stuck in a relationship, job or state that we can't stand. When I feel this way, I think of Holocaust survivor Viktor E. Frankl and his life changing book, Man's Search for Meaning.
While we sometimes can't move, we have a choice to change our thinking. We can find ways even in an intolerable state to find meaning, power and even joy.
This week, we learn that an inspiring quote, changing our thoughts and understanding our partners can make a difference in how free we feel in our lives.
