This quiz is based on the seminal work of Melody Beattie in her book “Codependent No More.”
Do you tend to put your partner’s needs above your own? Does your mood shift based on your partner’s mood?
If you often forsake your own well-being for your partner’s, putting most of your energy into supporting them more than yourself, you may be in a codependent relationship.
Codependence refers to a repeated pattern of behavior that involves prioritizing the needs of others over your own.
You may have started the relationship not intending to become so dependent on the other person, but you’ve noticed that lately, your wants have slowly taken a back seat to theirs.
And this doesn’t just happen in your romantic relationships, but with friends, family, and even coworkers.
Some common codependency signs include:
- a tendency to ignore or minimize your own feelings
- doing things you don’t want to do to make the other person happy
- a tendency to apologize or take the blame to keep the peace and avoid conflict
- an excessive need to get approval from others
- a tendency to neglect your own desires and needs
- changing your mood to reflect how others feel or behave
- excessive concern about that person’s habits or behaviors
- experiencing guilt or anxiety when doing something for yourself
- a sense of self-worth and self-esteem that depends on what others think of you
- taking on more work than you can handle to lighten someone else’s load
Several factors can contribute to codependency. Childhood trauma and past relationships with your parents or caregivers may play a role in codependency.
If your codependent behavior begins to interfere with your daily life, consider reaching out to a mental health professional.
Codependency isn’t a formal diagnosis, but a mental health professional will be able to help you determine the underlying cause of this behavior. And with the right support, you can learn to manage it and build fulfilling friendships and relationships.
This codependency test is meant for anyone who thinks they may have traits of codependency and may benefit from professional support.
The statements in this quiz can help you figure out whether you might need the support of a mental health professional for the symptoms you’ve been experiencing.
A therapist can also help you determine if your issues may be a symptom of a different mental health condition and recommend a treatment plan if necessary.
This online screening is not intended to be a diagnostic tool. It will not guarantee that you may have traits of codependency.
Keep in mind that codependency is not an official diagnosis but a group of behaviors, tendencies, and traits that may require intervention and attention.
A mental health professional may be able to help you recognize the signs of codependency, overcome people-pleasing tendencies, and address any related mental health symptoms such as feelings of guilt or anxiety.
If you think a partner, friend, or family member may have codependency traits, you can take this quiz on behalf of them as well.
Keep in mind that the results may not be as accurate because they’re based on your perception of them and not their direct personal experience.
How do I know if I’m codependent?
The most telltale sign of codependency is a repeated pattern of putting the needs, well-being, and self-care of others over your own. Other signs of codependency include changing your mood based on how the other person behaves, doing things you don’t want to do to make the other person happy, having self-worth or self-esteem that depends on what the other person thinks of you, or neglecting your own desires or needs to please or fulfill those of your partner.
What are 10 characteristics of a codependent person?
Ten common character traits of codependency include:
- a tendency to minimize or ignore your own needs
- neglecting your own needs and desires to satisfy those of the other person
- self-worth or self-esteem that depends on what others think of you
- an excessive need for the approval of others
- doing things you don’t want to do to please the other person
- taking on more work than you can handle to lighten the other person’s load
- having anxiety or guilt when doing something for yourself
- taking on the blame to keep the peace and avoid conflict
- shifting or changing your mood to reflect how the other person feels
- a repeated pattern of avoiding conflict
There may be other signs of codependency including having a fear of rejection or making decisions for others to manage the other person’s expectations.
What does codependent behavior look like?
Codependency refers to a pattern of behavior that involves suppressing your own needs, well-being, and desires to meet those of another person. Some people associate codependent behavior with romantic relationships, but it can also be seen in relationships with friends, family, and even coworkers.
What mental illness has codependency?
Codependent behavior can be a symptom of several mental health conditions, including