Leaving a domestic violence situation is one of the bravest decisions you can make. Connecting with others, spending time in nature, and rebuilding a sense of safety can help improve your well-being.

Beginning your recovery journey from a domestic violence situation can feel overwhelming, but it’s a crucial moment for empowerment and self-care.

If you’re currently experiencing or seeking support on how to get out of a domestic violence situation, you’re not alone. Seeking support from professionals who specialize in domestic violence, leaning on loved ones you trust, and exploring strategies that can help you connect with yourself can help.

Consider focusing on the five main areas below to start your journey to recovery.

Experiencing domestic violence (DV) can deeply affect one’s feelings of safety and trust in others. Rebuilding a sense of security is vital for healing and progress. This involves focusing on creating a safe environment that nurtures both physical and emotional well-being.

Here’s how to get started:

  • Secure living arrangements: Ensure your new living space is secure, whether it’s with trusted family or friends or in a shelter. If needed, make sure the location is confidential, and consider changing locks or adding security measures.
  • Self-affirmation: Self-affirmation involves recognizing and reinforcing positive aspects of yourself. Make a list of your strengths, talents, and past achievements, no matter how small. Reflect on these daily to remind yourself of your capabilities.
  • Setting goals: Setting goals provides direction and motivation, helping you regain a sense of control and purpose in your life. For example, you may set a goal to find a safe environment for your children or seek reliable contacts in case of an emergency.

Connecting with others after leaving a domestic violence situation is crucial for healing and rebuilding a support network. Sharing with others provides emotional validation, helps process trauma, and combats feelings of isolation.

Here’s how to connect:

  • Family and friends: Connecting with loved ones helps combat feelings of isolation and loneliness that often accompany leaving a DV situation. Consider discussing moments to spend quality time together or setting aside time to speak with them on the phone. Their support can bolster your emotional resilience.
  • Support groups: Research local or online support groups that specialize in domestic violence recovery. These groups provide a safe space to share experiences and learn coping strategies from others who’ve been through similar situations.
  • Counseling: Seek professional counseling or therapy with a licensed therapist who specializes in trauma and DV. Counseling can help you process emotions, heal from psychological wounds, and rebuild self-esteem.
  • Building new relationships: Engaging in activities or hobbies that interest you, such as art or karate classes, can provide opportunities to meet new people in a safe and supportive environment.

Engaging with nature, such as going to a park, beach, forest, or garden, can support your emotional and mental well-being as you recover.

Research shows that nature can heal people who’ve experienced trauma through the following pathways:

  • Holistic engagement: Nature therapy engages multiple senses and bodily systems, which can help control emotions better and lessen the intense reactions often seen in trauma.
  • Cognitive and emotional benefits: Being in nature calms the limbic system (associated with emotions) and enhances the prefrontal cortex (responsible for executive functions), promoting better cognitive control and emotional stability.
  • Physical mastery: Activities in nature encourage physical movement and mastery, which can rebuild a sense of agency and control over one’s body and environment. It can also help foster empowerment and confidence.
  • Narrative reconstruction: Engaging with natural environments can facilitate the reconstruction of personal trauma narratives by offering a peaceful setting conducive to reflection, introspection, and processing of difficult experiences.

Connecting with yourself after leaving a domestic violence situation is crucial for healing and rebuilding your sense of identity and self-worth.

Here are some strategies:

  • Journaling: Spend time reflecting on your experiences and emotions. Writing in a journal can help you process your thoughts and feelings, understand your journey, and identify patterns or triggers.
  • Hobbies: Rediscover hobbies and activities you once enjoyed or try new ones. Engaging in creative outlets like painting, writing, or playing music can be therapeutic and help you reconnect with your passions and interests.
  • Self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. Acknowledge your strength and resilience in leaving the DV situation. Avoid self-blame and recognize that healing is a journey. Allow yourself to feel a range of emotions without judgment.

Many recovery programs, such as Alcoholics Anonymous, encourage individuals to seek encouragement and strength from a higher power. This often involves a search for peace, guidance, and strength beyond oneself.

Similarly, for those recovering from DV, connecting to a higher power can provide crucial emotional support and inner resilience during the healing process.

Here are some ways to do that:

  • Spiritual and philosophical texts: Reading ancient spiritual texts like the Bible or the Tao Te Ching can help you find spiritual growth and deeper meaning in life. You may also consider reading modern works such as “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle or “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz.
  • Meditation: Practicing meditation can create a sense of inner peace and a deeper connection to one’s spirituality.
  • Gratitude and positive thinking: Keeping a gratitude journal can help you focus on the good and feel more connected to the world around you. Focusing on your strengths and achievements can help you cultivate a positive mindset and foster a sense of inner peace and resilience.
  • Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness involves focusing on the present moment with full awareness and without judgment. Find a quiet space, sit comfortably, and concentrate on your breathing. Observe your thoughts and sensations as they arise, gently bringing your focus back to your breath whenever your mind wanders.

A 2020 study suggests that spirituality is positively related to psychological well-being. It also indicates that this relationship is partly mediated by health-related behaviors, meaning that spirituality can lead to healthier behaviors, which in turn enhance well-being.

Leaving a domestic violence situation is a significant step toward ensuring your safety and well-being.

Try to prioritize your physical and emotional health. You can do this by rebuilding a sense of safety and reconnecting with yourself, nature, and supportive relationships. During this time, it can be helpful to start small as you begin your journey to recovery.

For example, focusing on one or two key goals at a time can potentially prevent feelings of overwhelm. It may also help you maintain clarity.

Remember, you deserve a life free from violence and full of peace and healing.