I started out as a very troubled child. I had many problems and brushes with the law because of it. I was constantly battling my parents because I thought I was always right. School was a mess; I never got good grades — I just couldn’t seem to concentrate on anything. There were always thoughts racing through my head, and I didn’t know what to do about it.
I had so many problems in the 7th grade that the family courts had enough of me and they sent me to military school, where my problems progressed even further. I could never control my racing thoughts so I tried to escape them–I tried running from my problems but nothing seemed to work. So I started drinking and that just made things worse. It wasn’t untill I turned 19 that I was finally diagnosed with schizophrenia. I mean, I was hearing things in my head for years that sounded so real that I was actually starting to believe my own delusions. I was getting this bad.
My friends turned away from me. Then they put me on Risperdal and that worked good for a year or so to quell the voices and racing thoughts in my head — then it started losing its effectivness and the voices started returning again. So I ended up getting admitted into the hospital for mental health, but I’ve been there before so I was less nervous this time. For the length of time I was there I went through a nervous breakdown and ended up spending three years at Southern Tier Enviorments For Living in the small town of Wellsville, N.Y. for my illness.
At the time, they didn’t think I could live on my own or take care of myself. I had to prove to the state of N.Y. that I was capable of caring for myself. Then I got put on this medication called Geodon and all it did was make my symptoms worse than they ever were. In fact, it amplified them — the voices were louder than ever, so once again they changed my medication and presently I’m on Seroquel 300 mg. It works better than anything I have ever been on. I very rarely experience any symptoms, and Psych Central gives me a place where I can explore my illness with the help of others.