7 Tips on Developing and Maintaining a Successful Intimate Relationship
You probably wish to develop and maintain a successful intimate relationship. Unfortunately you, like many others, might find yourself failing time and again, without knowing why. The seven tips listed in this article explain the ways in which you might be harming your relationships, show you how to stop this from happening and how to develop and maintain a successful intimacy.
1. Get in touch with and understand the needs which affect your reactions and behaviors in a relationship.
Needs you are not aware of might be driving your reactions and behaviors. Are you, for example, driven by the need for love (which might drive you to be too submissive within a relationship?); the need for independence (which might drive you always to keep distance from your partner?), and so on. These needs often affect the way we react and behave in our relationships.
When you become aware of your needs and become able to free yourself from the impact they have over your reactions and behaviors, you will be able to behave with your partner in a healthy and mature way.
2. Understand the fears that drive your reactions and behaviors.
It is certain that you – like almost everybody else – have fears you are unaware of which harm your relationships, such as: the fear of commitment (which might drive you to escape from each and every relationship you begin to develop); the fear of being alone (which might drive you to jump into a relationship with whoever blinks at you); the fear of losing your independence (which drives you to be controlling with your partners); the fear of being hurt (which might drive you to be cautious with your partners, causing you never to dare to open up), and so on. Becoming aware of the fears that control you enables you to combat them and not let them interfere with your relationships.
3. Check whether your expectations are realistic.
It is great to have expectations! It is also natural to expect your partner to be there for you all the time; to love you unconditionally; to always understand you; to always remember your birthday. It is great to expect that you and your partner will always be in a good mood; will always be sexually attracted to one another, and so on.