The Cost of Not Paying Attention, and How to Come Back into Balance

Sometimes, when we are not paying attention or attending to what is in front of us in our lives, we throw ourselves out of balance. I was reminded of this last summer when I realized in a moment of panic that I had forgotten to turn the water off from the hose outside that I was using to add some water to our pool. Instead of letting the water run for a half hour or so, I had accidentally let it run for about 24 hours! This was a big mistake on many accounts, with consequences such as overflowing the pool, wasting precious water, potentially draining our well, during a drought no less, not to mention throwing the perfectly balanced water out of balance, as evidenced by the cloudy, murky color that it began to turn!
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How to Listen in the Digital Age

Have people been telling you to: “put down the phone and listen to me?”
Do you talk more frequently with Siri than with the people you live with?
Are you just waiting for the chance to check your messages when others speak?

If you are shamefully shaking your head "yes", listen up!

It’s time for you to learn the skills of active listening. Sure, it takes effort; but so does learning any skill. And it’s worth it, as it pays ever-increasing benefits in your home life and work life.
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Best of Our Blogs

Best of Our Blogs: April 18, 2017

What if you approached your life as a class?

What if every situation was an opportunity to exercise patience, compassion or self-acceptance?

I experimented with this today as I was running late for a doctor's appointment. Instead of the goal of trying to get their on time, I focused on being mindful. Instead of worrying about how I would juggle the appointment and my son, I worked on accepting whatever moment presented itself.

It was still hard to manage a tired toddler, but it was also easier than I expected. Without being attached the outcome, I was free of unnecessary disappointment and frustration.

This week, you can also learn to see your current challenges as opportunities. Is there a way you can rethink your life as a way to broaden your worldview and learn something new about yourself? Our posts on why you're always too busy to relax, and what your emotions can teach you will help answer that.
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Feeling Negative? Something Needs to Change

“Negative emotions like loneliness, envy, and guilt have an important role to play in a happy life; they’re big, flashing signs that something needs to change.” – Gretchen Rubin

Look in the mirror. See that grumpy face staring back at you? What you’re feeling inside is coming to the surface to let you know that all is not where it needs to be right now. Those tears you can’t stop shedding? They’re tangible evidence of a powerfully negative emotion that you must deal with to get on with life.

Other negative emotions that play out in interactions with others and because of inaction or unwillingness to confront a situation that needs to change include
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New Experiences Can Enrich Your Life

Every once in a while, for your mental health, you should try something new, something completely different from your day-to-day life activities.

I did that this weekend when my husband, son and I drove down to southern Ohio and stayed in an authentic log cabin complete with a wood-burning stove, gingham curtains and an embroidered picture that said “cabin sweet cabin.”

But this wasn’t the main attraction; the most exciting new and different activity I engaged in was horseback riding.
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Brain and Behavior

Decision Fatigue: Does it Help to Wear the Same Clothes Every Day?

Ever since the late Steve Jobs popularized the idea, some folks have been enamored by the idea that by wearing the same clothes everyday, you are somehow setting yourself up for greater success. The psychological reasoning behind this is the idea that the fewer decisions you have to make every day on rudimentary tasks (like choosing your clothing, what you're going to eat, etc.), the more brain power you have available for more important decisions.

But is that true? Does cutting out simple decisions about clothing really likely to significantly impact your overall brain reserve for the day?

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Marriage and Divorce

Marriage: Ball and Chain or Free to Be You?

If you’ve been doing fine on your own for some time, you may fear that marriage will cost you your freedom. Actually, a good marriage supports you to be free to be who you are, because partners consider each other’s needs, as well as their own.

It takes some maturity to do this. Happy couples balance spending time together and apart in ways that suit both partners. They collaborate to make big decisions, like about very large expenses, parenting, leisure time activities, and so on.
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ADHD and Adults: More Tips for Creating Structure When Your Job Has None

ADHD affects how you work. It can affect you even more when your job doesn’t come with built-in structure. When you don’t have set hours. When you work from home. When there’s no boss breathing down your neck, waiting for your next report or project.

ADHD can create many challenges for people who don’t have traditional 9 to 5 jobs -- anyone from a real estate agent to a writer to a coach to an independent attorney. For instance, ADHD makes it harder to plan and break down tasks into action steps, said Bonnie Mincu, a senior certified ADHD coach who was diagnosed with ADHD in her 40s. It makes it tougher to prioritize, organize and start projects.
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