Interesting Person, Boring Life
You might think that if you are a person who has interesting ideas and inspired imagination, you would be living an exciting life. Sorry, it’s not necessarily so.
There may be an abundance of reasons, but the one that wins the prize for robbing you of that exciting, inspiring, interesting life you could have is (drum roll, please) an abundance of fear.
Fear has the ability to restrict, constrict, pinch and squeeze all the juiciness out of life. Once that happens, life feels like it’s nothing more than taking care of routine, mundane, dull tasks (which you hate) and dealing with crises, catastrophes and tragedies that plop down at your doorstep when you least expect it.
With fear at the helm, life can feel like “just one darn thing after another.” To make matters worse, fear can muddle up your thinking so that you don’t even recognize that fear is the culprit.
How does fear manage to do all this? Oh, let me count the ways.
- Fear can constrict your thinking. If you have fallen into a pattern of reflexive naysaying (“oh, I couldn’t do that”), that’s the voice of fear. Despite your creative imagination, fear can limit your willingness to even consider the possibility of expanding your thoughts beyond a narrow, preconceived range of options.
- Fear can pinch your choices. Yes, you may have interesting ideas, but that doesn’t mean those ideas will develop into choices that might make your life more vibrant. Instead, you may convince yourself that you have no choice but to live within your too-tight comfort zone. Then you complain that you have so few options. You may respond to well-meaning suggestions by worrying about possible setbacks, pitfalls, and problems that may occur if you did take a chance. Over time, you end up feeling hemmed in by the world rather than energized by it.
- Fear can restrict your activities. There may be lots of experiences that you are enticed by. After all, you are an interesting person. Yet, fear can narrow the range of activities you actually pursue. You may habitually turn down invitations or refuse to try a new activity, telling yourself, “I’m uncomfortable with that,” or “I’m no good at that.”
- Fear can make you feel physically exhausted and emotionally depleted. You may find creative work difficult, even impossible. You may find relationships a source of fatigue and burnout rather than pleasure and sustenance. You may find taking a risk terrifying rather than invigorating.
Yes, a fearful lifestyle can make an interesting person lead a boring life. So, don’t let fear squeeze the juiciness out of your life. Fear less, live more!
Here are a few ways to make the journey from interesting person, boring life to interesting person, exciting life.
- Back then I was afraid to admit I was afraid. Now I know that feelings aren’t right or wrong, they just are. They come and go. And I don’t need to be governed by them.
- Back then I was a bundle of nerves, always worrying about what might go wrong. Now I know that life is full of surprises. I can’t prevent the unexpected from happening, so why make that my mission?
- Back then I always played it safe. Now I’m not afraid to go out on a limb. The fruit there is usually quite delicious!
- Back then I felt that I had few choices in life. Now I believe that there are many opportunities open to me, provided I put in the effort to make them happen.
- Back then I was afraid of dying. Now I’m too busy living to worry about the day my life will end.
Sapadin, L. (2018). Interesting Person, Boring Life. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 1, 2020, from https://psychcentral.com/blog/interesting-person-boring-life/