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Happiness

These 9 Beliefs Block Your Path to Inner Peace

"Enlightenment is a destructive process. It has nothing to do with becoming better or being happier. Enlightenment is the crumbling away of untruth. It’s seeing through the facade of pretense It’s the complete eradication of everything we imagined to be true." -- Adyashanti
I don’t know exactly when it happened.

It was probably about eighteen months ago, maybe a couple of years. I can’t really remember, and it doesn’t really matter.

I was up to my neck in stress, and having one of those days.

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Creativity

8 Small Ways to Declutter That Make a Big Difference in Your Space and Mood

Motherhood coach Denaye Barahona, Ph.D, started decluttering her home by decluttering her closet. After she was done, her closet actually became a place she wanted to be. It became a space of solitude, quiet and calm -- a feeling she “quickly came to love.” Which inspired her to declutter her entire home “in search of this calm feeling that I wanted to bring to my entire family.”

It’s hard to feel calm when you’re surrounded by clutter: surfaces with piles resembling the leaning tower of Pisa; toys strewn all over the floor; clothing jam-packed in your closet; random receipts, paperwork and coupons in random places. “Visually, clutter makes us feel chaotic and unfocused,” said Carrie Higgins, who writes the blog
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Addiction

4 Perils of Perfectionism

Many of us hold high expectations for ourselves. We strive for a goal that is impossible to reach, whether in our love life, worklife, or family life. When we fall short, as we inevitably do, we may become paralyzed by self-criticism and shame.

Here are four pitfalls that result from our penchant to strive for perfection -- and how to keep our expectations under control.

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General

The Most Important, Probing Questions to Repeatedly Ask Ourselves

When we sweep our emotions under the rug, they’re invisible to the outside world. But the more emotions we stuff down, the bigger the pile becomes. And eventually it starts seeping out, shaping our relationships with ourselves and with others.

Clinical psychologist Aimee Martinez, Psy.D, uses this analogy with her clients to underscore the power of checking in with ourselves and processing our feelings—something that’s vital to do on a regular basis.
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Friends

Flexible Boundaries: Affirming Ourselves While Staying Connected

Personal boundaries are often discussed as knowing where we end and others begin. Boundaries define who we are -- honoring ourselves as a separate individual with needs and wants that differ from others. Without setting boundaries, we may allow others to trample over us and override our own feelings and what’s important to us. We lose our voice; we get lost in their world of desires. Having very weak boundaries, we may get eaten alive by people who are very clear about what they want!

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Habits

The Power of Vulnerability

Welcome to my confessional!

(Yes, my confessional is an international website where thousands of people read and--perhaps--groan at my pithy columns).

As I write my latest screed, I often wonder, Am I being too vulnerable? From discussing my frayed family (insert a wry Happy Holidays) to my smoldering anxiety, I divulge my biggest, baddest secrets to, well, everyone.   
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Friends

Smiling Improves Your Emotional and Spiritual Health

I’ve been fortunate to visit Thailand many times and after being here again, I’ve been asking myself: How is it that so many Thai people are quick to flash spontaneous and radiant smiles? Spend even a little time here and you’ll understand why Thailand is called “The Land of Smiles.”

A cynical interpretation is that smiling faces are a fake show of happiness designed to captivate tourists. And of course, a smile can sometimes cover up one's true feelings, such as nervousness, anger, or sadness. But from my own observations and after speaking with many savvy travelers, I'm convinced that the smiles are often genuine.

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Creativity

A Different Take on New Year’s Resolutions

We tend to set resolutions that punish us for the things we did the previous year. For instance, because we supposedly ate too much or gained weight over the holidays, we decide we’re going on a diet, we’re cutting out sugar, and we’re eating “clean.” We decide we’re going to lose 15 pounds by some arbitrary date. Or we decide to work out five days a week—no exceptions, rain or shine or sickness. Or we decide we're going to hustle and work 70 hours a week because we took too many breaks.
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