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Building Your Emotional Container

After a long day you are finally sitting down to a candle-lit dinner with your wife, husband, or special someone. The kids are sleeping or being watched by a babysitter. The food is all prepared and smells great. All that’s left to do is sit down and enjoy the blissful evening to come. The stage is set, the timing is perfect, and nothing is in your way.

Out of nowhere, the peaceful energy that had just started to creep up and develop between the both of you is quickly replaced with an argument. The little seed of sweet harmony is promptly banished with arguing or hostility.

Why is it so challenging not to throw in a comment that probably will cause an argument or ruin the evening? Why is it so hard to be able to experience these types of special moments? What is so threatening about bliss and peace that on some level it needs to be ruined? Why is it so much easier to maintain the status quo of arguments and cold peace than create a fuzzy and love-filled environment?

The more stressed or emotionally blocked we are, the more difficult it becomes to contain intense emotions. We lose our ability to fully contain or handle intense feelings, even when they are positive. We lose our inner container to be able to hold and enjoy those experiences.

In the above example, being able to really feel love and serenity was too much to handle or contain, so the moment needed to be broken. But don’t worry, there is hope.

The power of a mind-body approach toward emotional healing is that it helps to expand and develop your emotional container. This process enables you to be able to handle a wider range of emotion without getting overwhelmed.

As you expand your ability to handle emotion on a wider range of intensity, you can begin to access the beauty of life on a deeper level. Think of the possibilities: the sun shining that was never noticed or soaked up; the food that was never fully tasted; the relationships that were never fully appreciated or enjoyed. By deepening your healing and strengthening your nervous system, you can expand your ability to truly handle the beauty and positive intensity of life all around you. Additionally, you won’t get thrown off by negative triggers as easily.

By investing to deepen your emotional container you will have great returns that will enable you to have a richer, deeper, and more enjoyable life.

Candlelight dinner photo available from Shutterstock

Building Your Emotional Container

Dovid Meshchaninov, MS

Dovid Meshchaninov, MS, is a coach, healer, and mind-body practitioner. Dovid has a Masters in Counseling Psychology in addition to advanced training in Somatic Experiencing, Craniosacral therapy, and Somatic Psychology. Dovid has a private practice in Los Angeles dedicated to helping individuals overcome anxiety and achieve deep emotional healing by combining both talk therapy and mind-body modalities. Skype sessions are available as well. To get Dovid’s powerful free short audio on helping you overcome stress and anxiety just click here.

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APA Reference
Meshchaninov, D. (2018). Building Your Emotional Container. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 29, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 Jul 2018 (Originally: 10 Sep 2015)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 Jul 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.