Need treatment? Find help or get online counseling right now!

Anxiety and Panic

Should You Take that Job? 5 Signs Your Gut Says ‘No’

Most of the choices we make every day are simple and straight-forward: what to wear to work, what to eat for lunch, whether to go to sleep at a reasonable hour or stay up watching Netflix. They don’t cause much stress or inner conflict.

Career transition points, on the other hand, can leave you feeling significantly more stuck -- especially when you’re facing a big, life-changing decisions.
Continue Reading

Depression

Not All Depression Is Alike: Tips to Improve Situational Depression

The word depression is used in different contexts. Some people claim it for minor problems like being disappointed, hurt or discouraged. Others use it to describe feelings of such heaviness and dejection that they are barely able to function. Symptoms may be so severe that it becomes a life-long debilitating condition where clinical interventions are warranted to redress chemical or hormonal imbalances within the body.

A more common form of depression is very much linked to external circumstances that overwhelm a person’s ability to process and deal with life’s challenges. Difficult experiences or chronic stress can shake one’s sense of self, reduce options, shatter plans and dash hopes for the future. This easily opens the door to feeling lost, worthless and depressed. Hidden within such feelings may be other emotions like anger, fear of the future, disappointment, grief, despair, regret or guilt. Unexamined and unexpressed, they only increase the inner anguish and loss of joy.
Continue Reading

General

Cultivating an Internal Locus of Control — and Why It’s Crucial

You didn’t get the job you really wanted. But you aren’t surprised. The odds were stacked against you anyway. Even if you prepared more, the result would’ve been the same: Someone else would’ve gotten the position.

Or you did get the job. But it has nothing to do with your qualifications, experience or interview skills. You were just at the right place at the right time. You got lucky.

You decide to start dating. Your first date is awful. It’s awkward, and they spend the entire time talking about themselves. Which only makes you feel more and more rejected. But you’re not surprised, because this seems to happen often.
Continue Reading

Creativity

5 Ways to Let It Flow

“The mind is like a river, and, as with a river, there’s no point in trying to stop its flow.” – Mingyur Rinpoche

You know when you get into a groove, you just want to keep on going. You might say you’re “in the flow,” “going with the flow,” “in your sweet spot,” or some other catchy phrase.
It feels good.
You want it to continue.
Why don’t you let it?
Continue Reading

Brain and Behavior

You Can Train Your Brain to Be More Positive with These Steps

The clients I work with tend to have a few things in common: they are smart, ambitious, and highly motivated. Most of them are also stressed to the max.

From the outside, they appear powerful and poised. But on the inside, they worry about their ability to deal with the demands that come along with having a successful career.

If you’re a top-performer, you can probably relate. In fact,
Continue Reading

Anxiety and Panic

Driftin’ Away

“Well, when I graduated from college, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. So what do most reasonably smart, analytical types do after college? They go to law school,” I wryly chuckled to my counselor. “It is a three-year holding pattern for the chronically undecided. It is the new open studies major.”

Unlike some friends (“I knew I wanted to be a pediatric doctor at age four,” a long-time confidante once told me), I drifted into my profession. There was no sense of calling -- unless you count my father’s hysterical phone calls about turning down a prestigious law school. Truthfully, law school was more of a fallback than bubbling “C” on those deceptively difficulty Iowa Test of Basic Skills multiple choice tests.
Continue Reading

Habits

Got Stress? If Your Glass Is Always Half Empty — Get a Smaller Glass!

In this day and age, if you are not familiar with being “stressed out” on occasion, you better check your pulse because you may not be breathing.

Nonetheless, most of us experience stress as a consistent, pesky little inevitability that follows us around throughout the day, gnawing away at our nerves and testing our patience. Others experience it as severe anxiety which can become serious and debilitating. But no matter how you slice it, unless you are living in a cave, stress will always find you.


Now, what if at times we had some say over how stress affects us? What if we could alter our perspective and see things differently? What if we could develop new eyes despite our current circumstances remaining the same?
Continue Reading

General

A Powerful Exercise for Moving Past Regret

You stayed in many toxic relationships. Many years too long. You never finished college. You left a really good job for a job you now can’t stand. You had countless embarrassing, neglectful drunken moments, which ultimately led to your divorce. You filed for bankruptcy. You racked up thousands upon thousands of dollars in student loans. You threw yourself into work while a loved one was dying. You pursued the profession your parents demanded. You didn’t say what you wanted to say. You didn’t trust yourself.

And you regret it. And you keep thinking about these regrets—these bad moments, these bad decisions—over and over and over. You play out various scenarios. You play out different decisions you could’ve made.
Continue Reading

ADHD and ADD

ADHD and Adults: 8 Effective Shortcuts for Home and Work

When you have ADHD, you might feel bad -- frustrated, angry, ashamed -- that you can’t accomplish certain tasks like everyone else. Why is it so hard to make a meal? Why do I forget my wallet every time?

You might feel bad that you can’t use the same methods. Why do I need a creative approach just to do laundry? It’s so simple!

“The ADHD mind is wired differently than someone without ADHD, and it’s not fair to assume they should do things the same way,” said Nikki Kinzer, a certified ADHD coach dedicated to helping people with ADHD build positive life habits, reduce stress, and take back control of their lives. “You can’t force a circle into a square.”
Continue Reading

General

How to Start Loving Yourself

There’s a great quote attributed to Lucille Ball: “Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” And you really have to love yourself to love others, and to create a fulfilling life.

However, many of us aren’t sure what self-love even looks like. Once something becomes a buzzword, it tends to lose its meaning and significance. It becomes relegated to a trend. It gets dismissed.

So what does it mean to love ourselves?
Continue Reading