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How to Stop Taking Yourself So Seriously

“The one serious conviction that a man should have is that nothing is to be taken too seriously.” – Samuel Butler
Do you think of yourself as a serious person? Do you find little to laugh about or is it difficult to let yourself go and enjoy what you’re doing, who you’re with, what you must look forward to tomorrow? There’s a difference between being thoughtful and earnest and being serious. I like to think that seriousness must involve an important situation or problem, not a demeanor I want to portray on an everyday basis. Some might say that I’m too easygoing, but that’s not it, either. I simply want to take life as it comes, do the best I can, and be hopeful and positive in the process.
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Best of Our Blogs

Best of Our Blogs: June 30, 2017

I think the reason why many of us don't take care of ourselves is not because we don't believe it's important. We don't do what we need to do, because it requires us to do the hard stuff.

We're forced to put up boundaries.

We're forced to confront issues, people and situations we would rather deny and avoid.

Instead of running or escaping, we're face to face with the thing, and it can either make us tough, gritty and self-confident or it can bury us deeper in self-denial and resentment.

It's not easy to do the hard thing. Sometimes we're just not up for it. Real positive transformation requires us to get courageous, show our true feelings, and feel the fear of being judged and do it anyway.
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Anger

Introspection for Blamers and Shamers

Some people in this world are expert blamers and shamers. Perhaps you know one. It begins with the need to blame: You did something bad. How could you have done this? Then it easily slides into the need to shame: You are something bad. What is the matter with you?

When something goes wrong, it can never be an accident, a random act of nature, a simple mistake, a lack of judgment, or a moment of inattentiveness. It cannot even be a misdemeanor. No, no, no, no, no! It’s got to be a felony.

Accidents are not allowed to happen. You heard me. No accidents. Somebody has to be blamed. And, amazingly enough, the finger is always pointed outwards.
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Aging

Aging Wisely

We all have something in common. We’re getting older.

While this fact might delight children who can’t wait to be “grown-ups,” it is often a source of angst for those of us who have already “grown up.” There are approximately 76 million baby boomers in the United States, and their ages range from the early fifties to the early seventies.

It’s not surprising that this demographic is often bombarded by the media with anti-aging everything: skin creams for every part of our bodies, miracle “cures” for our wrinkles, youthful colors for our hair. They all promise to make us look younger -- to fix us. Botox and facelifts have become the norm for many people (men and women), and again, there is cosmetic surgery available for almost every part of our bodies.
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Children and Teens

Podcast: What Can We Learn from the Michelle Carter Texting Suicide Case?

In this episode of the Psych Central Show, hosts Gabe Howard and Vincent M. Wales examine the recent case of Michelle Carter, a young woman in Massachusetts who was tried for involuntary manslaughter in the suicide of her eighteen-year old friend, Conrad Roy, based primarily on a series of text messages and phone calls. In what came as a shock to many, Carter was found guilty. The trial focused on extensive messages between the two, especially in the month leading up to Roy’s death, in which it is shown that the then seventeen-year old Carter went from urging Roy to seek help to actively helping him plan for his own death and, finally, to blatantly urging him to take his own life.
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Marriage and Divorce

A Successful Relationship Requires Complete Authenticity


It's time to get real.

Recently I was at Sex Geek Conservatory with Reid Mihalko of ReidAboutSex and Cathy Vartuli of The Intimacy Dojo. They had us do an exercise in which we took two minutes each to teach one simple concept.

As I thought about the concept I would teach, I realized that the most important piece of relationship advice I could give to someone who wants to be happy would be the advice to always be yourself and to always be authentic in all aspects of your life, and especially in your romantic relationships.
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Alternative and Nutritional Supplements

10 Summer Depression Busters

Although my mood seems to be better with more sun, I understand why a substantial number of folks get more depressed in the summer. Extreme heat is hard to tolerate. In fact, in a study published in Science in 2013, researchers reported that as temperatures rose, the frequency of interpersonal violence increased by 4 percent, and intergroup conflicts by 14 percent.
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