“Trust only movement.” – Alfred Adler
Of all the virtues that a person could possess, trust is one of the more difficult ones to fully comprehend. You know you want to trust others as well as yourself, but that doesn’t always come so easily. You may have some doubts about your own trustworthiness, let alone trust the intentions of others. The more conflicted you are about other areas of your life, the less likely you are to feel confident enough to trust.
What can you do to change this? How can you begin to trust yourself and others? Here are some suggestions to get started.
If movement is the only thing you can put your trust in, one solution is to keep moving. This includes physical exercise as well as mental movement. For example, you can be moving ahead when you immerse yourself in a book and devour the ideas and contents within. You can also engage in movement by taking a walk outside, climbing up and down stairs, playing basketball with your friends or football with the kids. Even walking a shopping mall in search of deals is a form of movement.
You know that when you put one foot in front of the other, you’re going to move. That is, unless you’re hindered by an object or person standing in your way. However, the deliberate act of putting one foot in front of the other means you intend to move and you follow through on it to achieve the result. This is something you can trust. It’s also action that you have full control over.
Learn from everything you do.
Inaction, on the other hand, does little to inspire trust. Suppose you’re worried that you’ll fail at an action you’re thinking about taking. If you do nothing, what happens to your worry? It remains. It may even intensify. That does your sense of self-trust no good at all. Sometimes taking the risk to move forward with a planned action is worth whatever mistakes and missteps you encounter. Whatever you do, be sure to learn from the result. There is always a lesson. It’s up to you to figure out what it is and make full use of it.
Don’t fear failure.
Much personal mistrust stems from the fear of falling flat, completely blowing an assignment, missing an important deadline, promoting a plan or approach that fails. So, what if you try something and it fails? Many of the world’s greatest inventions and accomplishments only occurred after failure, sometimes repeated failures. What prompted the ultimate success? It’s not a secret, but sound advice. After failure, analyze your actions and figure out what you could have done differently. This gives you something to go on the next time. You’ve put aside your fears and worked through them. Granted, the initial result was less than you hoped for, but you at least have an approach you can employ when you take up this task, project or activity again. This helps bolster your trust because you’re not left hanging without anything to show for it.
Capitalize on your strengths and talents.
Everyone has strengths and talents. The problem that many people have when they lack trust is that they cannot seem to recognize their innate gifts or developed abilities. They’re too consumed with the belief that they can’t do anything right, let alone make use of what they’re good at. Go back to those abilities and strengths and give them a thorough look. If you’re excellent at math, there’s a way to profit from that. Whether it’s figuring out dimensions on a shed you want to build or creating a potentially lucrative business proposition, drawing on your ability with numbers is a natural way to build self-trust and inspire trust in you from others.
Do your best at one thing at a time.
Rushing to get a project done and constantly allowing interruptions to occupy your time will do more to deplete self-trust than you can imagine. In fact, it’s self-sabotage. The key to successful completion of any task or undertaking is total concentration and focus. Eliminate distractions. Prioritize steps. Set a schedule and work towards a timetable. Acknowledge the small wins along the way. This both serves to motivate you to keep going and builds trust simultaneously. Even if your efforts don’t pan out right away, if you’ve done your best, you know instinctively that you have made inroads and learned valuable lessons that will serve you well the next time.
Recognize that trust is self-building and replenishing.
A salient point about trust, perhaps one of the best things, is that it builds upon itself. Furthermore, even if you’ve wiped out all trust by your past misdeeds, you can begin to rebuild it over time. The more you do, the more you will help replenish your reservoir of trust. If you trust yourself, others will as well.