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3 New Year’s Resolutions You’re Going to Break — and How to Plan for Success Instead

indexThe first days of the new year are always the same. You start off strong, a long list of resolutions planned, ready to conquer your career goals. And you do — for a week, maybe two, or even a few months if you’re on a roll.

Then, something throws you off track. The culprit may be a seemingly insignificant workplace annoyance, but it has the power to affect your motivation in a big way.

It’s easy to become discouraged and frustrated when resolutions don’t go as planned. If, for example, you made it a goal to organize your desk every morning, but are called into an unscheduled, impromptu meeting first thing one day, it’s natural to think, “Well, I missed today,” letting yourself off the hook. The problem is you forget the next day and for weeks after that. And such begins the cycle of self-doubt and frustration that ultimately leads to you dropping your resolutions completely.

There are a few basic reasons these ambitious goals flop, including overcommitting and attempting to change too much too quickly. Bad habits are hard to break and it’s even harder to establish new ones. Trying to undo behaviors that have become second nature is like trying to rewire your brain.

In order to help you avoid the usual pitfalls and see your goals to fruition this year, here are three career-related New Year’s resolutions you should avoid making — and three better goals to aim for instead.

Goal No. 1: Get a Promotion or Raise

It’s easy to get caught up in the hype and make half-hearted resolutions that you’re not really serious about. At a loss for a better idea or because of pressure from friends and family, you might land on getting a raise or promotion. After all, everyone wants to make more money or have more responsibility, so why not resolve to do so?

Why it Will Fail

If the above scenario sounds like you, you probably won’t be working toward this resolution long. Why? Because you likely lack the personal motivation to accomplish it. Goals made because you feel pressured to make them are destined to fail because the commitment just doesn’t exist. While the thought of getting a promotion is intriguing, you may not be ready to take the steps required to make it a reality. You have to be steadfast in your decision and prepared for the longer hours and larger workloads that may accompany it.

This plan is also inherently flawed because it depends heavily on someone else’s judgment. You may be deserving of the raise, but ultimately, higher authorities must agree. Goals that rely too much on factors beyond your control can be easily derailed, no matter how hard you work to see them through.

A resolution centered on earning a raise or promotion also suffers from the problem of the “arrival fallacy.” We fixate so intensely on a reward that when it arrives, it does not produce the anticipated result. It’s easy to think, “I’ll be happy when…” about a promotion, but this isn’t always the case. Instead of feeling accomplished, for example, you might feel unchanged or even disappointed because you realize the promotion or raise didn’t actually amount to much. Yes, you may get paid more or have more responsibilities, but your work life won’t suddenly be perfect, and your career won’t peak overnight.

The Upgraded Resolution

To make this resolution attainable, shift from aiming for a promotion to focusing on continual improvement. You should be concerned with becoming the type of employee worthy of a raise or promotion. That means zoning in on the skills, traits, and attributes that, if mastered, would elevate you into a high-value member of your team. Consider speaking with your supervisor about what qualities your company looks for in candidates for promotion, then work toward those specific milestones.

Goal No. 2: Attend More Networking Events

This is a common resolution because the connection between networking and career success is a much-talked-about phenomenon. You’ve probably heard people say, “It’s all about who you know,” or maybe you’ve seen this approach at work in your office.

Why it Will Fail

The difficulty with this resolution, admirable as it may be, is that you’re likely forgetting to account for the time it will take to accomplish. Networking means dedicating time to social events, attending conferences, or joining a professional organization. How will these added commitments fit into your already-busy schedule?

The answer is, they probably won’t. If you’re struggling to keep up with your current responsibilities, trying to add a goal like this one will almost certainly fail.

The Upgraded Resolution

Just because you can’t fit this into your schedule this very second doesn’t mean you should abandon it altogether. If it’s important to you and your professional development, it’s worth taking stock of your responsibilities and making networking a priority.

Start by making a “to-don’t list.” Identify which of your current commitments are most important, and eliminate the rest. No one likes to feel like they’re letting someone down or going back on promises, so saying no to – or ending – a commitment can be difficult. But, if you’re serious about achieving your goals, then you have to be dedicated to eliminating anything that doesn’t directly contribute to your success. If, for example, you have been helping a co-worker run a subcommittee that isn’t part of your job description, it may be time to pull back in order to free up time for more networking.

Goal No. 3: Be More Assertive

Whether you want to work on your delegation skills, say no to additional responsibilities more often, or establish better work-life boundaries, one of the most common workplace resolutions is a declaration to be more assertive. Developing self-assuredness is a worthy goal, especially since passivity can make you feel out of control and may even lead to co-workers treating you like a pushover. Unfortunately, though, simply vowing to do this probably won’t produce the impact you seek.

Why it Will Fail

The issue is that becoming more assertive is far too open-ended as a resolution. It’s not specific or measurable; thus, it’s easy to break. There are no set guidelines for what achieving “assertiveness” means, no steps for you to take or milestones to work toward. Without those metrics, you’re likely to lose sight of your goal or become frustrated with your lack of improvement before you even give it a fair chance.

The Upgraded Resolution

In order to make this achievable, narrow the scope. In what specific ways do you want to be more assertive? How do you plan to operationalize your goal into small, actionable steps that you can complete over time? These answers will be different for everyone, so you’ll need to customize your plan to suit your particular goals.

If you’re concerned that you don’t speak up enough at work, focus on seizing opportunities to contribute ideas during meeting. Establish a routine of brainstorming ten ideas for new projects to present in staff meetings. Or, take a public speaking or improv class to get used to presenting in front of a group.

If you’re a people pleaser, you’ll want to include goals that deal with refusing to take on too many responsibilities. Practice setting expectations with your boss, and establish guidelines for politely turning others down. Saying “no” flat out might be too harsh, but it’s completely acceptable to negotiate a new timeline that fits your busy schedule.

While the new year is a great time to reflect upon your career, workplace achievements, and areas in which you would like to improve, there’s absolutely no reason for you to place so much pressure to make progress on a single date. Change doesn’t happen overnight. Success at anything is the result of time, practice, and the development of good habits. Self-evaluate and adjust your goals year-round — not just on January 1. If you slip up every now and then, it’s OK. Think of your missteps as an opportunity to reflect, pivot, and keep working toward your dreams.

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3 New Year’s Resolutions You’re Going to Break — and How to Plan for Success Instead

Melody Wilding, LMSW

Melody Wilding, LMSW is a performance coach, licensed social worker, and has a Masters from Columbia. She helps established and rising managers and executives advance in their careers. Her clients work at companies like Google, Facebook, LinkedIn, HP, and Deloitte. She also helps entrepreneurs take bold steps to grow their businesses. Melody has helped over 10,000 smart, self-aware people like you. Her coaching gives you actionable strategies to reach your goals. You get concrete steps to overcome the complex struggles of success. Melody loves arming ambitious people with tools and tactics to boost their confidence. She can teach you skills for assertiveness and influence. Her specialties include better managing your emotions at work. Melody also teaches Human Behavior at CUNY Hunter College in NYC. She writes about psychology and careers for Inc., Forbes, Fast Company, and more. Click here and grab the FREE COURSE to go from insecure to unstoppable confidence 5 DAYS TO FREEDOM FROM SELF-DOUBT..

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APA Reference
Wilding, M. (2018). 3 New Year’s Resolutions You’re Going to Break — and How to Plan for Success Instead. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 24, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 Jul 2018 (Originally: 1 Jan 2016)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 Jul 2018
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