Yeah. Your dad has issues. Most people do in the time of COVID-19. I don’t think he is mentally ill, if that’s what your friends are suggesting. My guess is that he is under considerable stress about work, finances, and how to help support his family. In spite of all that, he decided it was his turn to cook as maybe a way to keep family life going normally – which meant sharing a kitchen (always tricky) when he was already maxed out.
Try to think about it this way. A bucket of water is full to the brim. When you add one drop more, water spills over the side. Did that drop make the bucket over-full? Nope. It was the total accumulation. Your cookie baking mess (and there’s no way to bake without making mess) put him over the top. Was it justified? Nope. Was it rational? Nope. Was it okay to take out his stress on you? Nope to that too. Can he apologize? Apparently, it’s not his style and your mom says asking you to dinner was an olive branch.
You can’t change your Dad’s style. But you can help him relieve his stress. Apologies aren’t always an admission of wrong doing. Sometimes they are just a way to say “okay, let’s move forward”.
For that reason, I suggest you stop waiting for him to apologize and do it yourself; not for making a mess but for not being sensitive to his level of stress. Thank him for asking you to dinner. Ask him if there is anything you can do to make things a bit easier for him. Promise to continue to do your best to pick up after yourself. See if there really are a few additional ways you can take his anxiety down a notch.
Please think about it.
I wish you well.