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What’s Real?

Asked by on with 1 answer:

From a young man in the U.S.:  I cut straight to it. Sometimes I can’t tell what’s real in my mind or not. I can’t tell if what I’m feeling is being caused by something tangible or not. Sometimes it feels like my thoughts aren’t my own. Like it’s coming from somewhere else. Not like it’s being beamed into my head or anything but it just seems fake. I feel fake. Like a amalgamation if so many things and their all fighting for control.

My thoughts race a lot. Like a room full of people trying to get their point across. I can’t tell where they come from. What if I’m somehow making up my mental illness what if I’ve convinced myself that I’m sick so my body just goes along with it. Sometimes my mood will switch instantaneously from a fairly okay mood not manically hyper but normal to completely pit falling a second later.

I was diagnosed with generalized depression but I feel like it’s something more. I argue with myself audibly sometimes. I have the feeling that I’m being punished by god for some wrongdoing. I feel like people can see past the phony facade I wear. Almost like they know me. The real me. I can see it in there eyes.

I don’t know who I am. I’ve spent the majority of my life attached to other people I never felt like my own person. There are times where I feel like I’m being watched but that’s a fairly new thing. Words seemingly change from one thing to another at times. I’m just worried I’m creating some kind of psychosis. Maybe I’m just reaching.

What’s Real?

Answered by on -

A.

For your own peace of mind, and perhaps to get some treatment, you need to go back to whoever gave you that diagnosis of major depression and tell her or him what you have shared here. If you think you can’t describe your experience accurately, give your prescriber a copy of your letter to us. You wrote and articulate and helpful narrative about what you are thinking and feeling. Reading it would be a good place for someone to start the road toward understanding you and helping you.

You do not have to suffer like this. You have serious concerns that need to be taken seriously. You deserve to get some answers. It may be that the original diagnosis was correct or it may be that it was incorrect or incomplete. There are a number of diagnoses that share symptoms. It’s possible that you are suffering from something in addition to depression.

A good, thorough assessment will help both you and your helpers take a new look and perhaps lead to a new set of recommendations for treatment.

I think you made an important first step in contacting us here at Psych Central. Now, please do yourself the favor of following through. Make an appointment with your prescriber as soon as you can. If COVID-19 is making an in-person appointment impossible, do ask your prescriber if he or she will talk to you on some kind of video call.

I wish you well.

Dr. Marie

What’s Real?

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Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2020). What’s Real?. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 24, 2020, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2020/06/02/whats-real/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 1 Jun 2020 (Originally: 2 Jun 2020)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 1 Jun 2020
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.