The fact that you have parents that are so dismissive of your mental health needs, blame you for being hospitalized, and won’t try ways to find help for you is more of a problem than anything else. While I am sorry you are having these difficulties at school, the lack of attention to your well-being at home, the unmedicated ADHD due to them not taking you for treatment, and them blaming you is the source of you not feeling good enough about yourself. Having parents that are not caring for your mental health needs is at the very core of the problem and what needs to change.
You’ve listed your age as 17, which means that you are not far away from adulthood. It may be time for you to take control of your life and stop relying on them to help, since, by not doing what they should have done, they are doing more harm than good.
There are a variety of symptoms with ADHD that can make much of what you are dealing with more difficult. Here are symptoms of ADHD taken from this terrific article by Psych Central’s own Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S. When an individual with ADHD is becoming a young adult the main issue often is impulsivity and lack of focus as elaborated on in this blog.
I would call your school counselor, who should still be obligated to talk to you. Explain to him or her that you believe that ADHD may be creating many of the problems and you’d like some help in getting tested by the school. Ask them to help negotiate this with your parents. The unmedicated ADHD may be a major source of the difficulties and having a professional evaluate you for the medicine needed to manage the depression and ADHD would be an important first step. There are also psychological and educational tests that can help you learn how to learn.
As difficult as it is the time is now for you to take responsibility for getting your own help. Since you are in school there can be some assistance from the counselors. Depression, anxiety, and ADHD are not an unusual combination for teenagers and there is real help out there. Find the people who can get you the help you need and may even be able to help get your parents to realize what they can do to help make things better.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral