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My Parents Are Neglectful & Shrug Off My Depression, How Do I Ask for Help?

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My parents are neglectful, lazy, and controlling (at least I can say about them). Long story short, they’ve emotionally abused and neglected me, so much so that when I threatened suicide at the age of 13, they cried for a bit, told me I was stupid b*tch, and didn’t take me to a psychiatrist until the age of 15, and then immediately cut me off from my supply of fluoxetine, after a year, when I said that the dosage didn’t quite help. Since my dad is never around due to his workaholic behavior, my mother takes care of the kids, and she’s terrible at doing so. She never wants to give me medicine or take me to the doctor even when I continue asking, begging even, for her to take me. In all honesty, I feel as if they both failed as parents, my dad being strict yet never being around, and my mom being lazy and not caring for her children, it’s shameful because my dad doesn’t even get paid that well. It’s like” Why do I even exist?” All in all, it’s infuriating and I needed to get this off my chest(so thank you if you read) because I don’t even have a therapist or anyone to get in contact with, how can I approach them for the 10th time now and ask them for some professional help? (From Puerto Rico)

My Parents Are Neglectful & Shrug Off My Depression, How Do I Ask for Help?

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A.

The deep strength of your character is already coming through showing your persistence and courage. Dealing with your neglectful and controlling parents while striving for your mental health is a powerful demonstration of your true self. You are a fighter and believer in your own well-being and need to flourish, Don’t lose sight of this as it is our character, perhaps more than anything else, that will pull us through.

Since you are still in high school, I would encourage you to talk to a trusted teacher or counselor. The key for you will be to get out of your house as soon as possible following graduation and the people at your high school can help you get services you need now, and help you get ready for college or trade work.

More specifically I would contact Hospital San Juan Capestrano. They have a program for teenagers and I would talk to them directly about your situation. They are likely to have some good suggestions for you in your area.

If your parents are not going to be helpful and have blocked your growth start making your own plan for your growth and development independent of them. Don’t wait for them to come to the realization that they need to support you. I’d like to come back around to your strengths, which I’ve mentioned in the beginning. Your character strengths are the way you move forward with hope and energy directed at a change in your life. I would take the character strength survey and follow the suggestions about bringing them more into your life. As you transition, you’ll want to reduce the hope you’ve had for better parents and turn toward you as a resource. Learning your character strengths is the best way to balance this process going forward.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

My Parents Are Neglectful & Shrug Off My Depression, How Do I Ask for Help?

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Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2020). My Parents Are Neglectful & Shrug Off My Depression, How Do I Ask for Help?. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 30, 2020, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2020/03/18/my-parents-are-neglectful-shrug-off-my-depression-how-do-i-ask-for-help/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 15 Mar 2020 (Originally: 18 Mar 2020)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 15 Mar 2020
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.