What a miserable situation for you to be in. It sounds like there is very little if any support for you no matter what is going on. How unfortunate that the bitterness between your mother and grandmother has put you right in the middle. It is a good goal for you to have to find a better place to live in. For now, the work is on making the best with the situation as you plan for the future.
Often at times like this, it is like passing through the neck of a bottle that slows down your progress, only to open later on. What is particularly important and noticeable is your strengths of courage, hope, self-regulation, and grit. You have been tolerating the situation and not losing your cool, while at the same time working on your career. Keep on that. The key to dealing with what is happening now is to create a future for yourself where you have more control. Develop your skills and talents by working hard at what you want to become.
Just because the situation at home isn’t good doesn’t mean you can’t find places where you can develop yourself. What I mean by this is that you are already demonstrating the natural qualities of a mature person. Importantly, you are reaching out for help and looking for answers. That, in and of itself is the most important trait for success. You have a passion for your career and persistence. Your music might be the way you can express your pain at home and may be what is going to help you get through this part of your life.
I will also encourage you to take this survey that will help identify the other strengths you have. This way you can keep working toward your future by investing in yourself.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral