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Violent & Aggressive Brother

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My twin brother for the past 2-3 years has been getting really violent and aggressive in his behavior. It gets worse nowadays. When told something, he reacts harshly to it and uses horrible language. He can also be physically violent ( he has a huge built ). He has tried to hurt me multiple times. If his other twin does not comply with whatever he says he hits and hurts him really bad and it can be for the simplest thing. He also hits my mother if she tries to scold him. He is also very weak in studies and his school teachers have been asking us to get him some kind of help or at least change the school. He also has the habit of taking money and other things from others without consent even from home. He takes the money from home and gives it away to his friends, which is something I still haven’t figured out fully. There are multiple things that he hides from us and I am worried as to what his future might turn out to be. (From UAE)

Violent & Aggressive Brother

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Without being too presumptuous, your brother’s antisocial personality might best be investigated through a series of clinical tests. At 16 years old with these types of issues: aggression, stealing, poor results with education, problems in multiple areas of his life, difficulty with relationships, and being secretive, point to a need for understanding more about his motivations and concerns. At its core, this sounds like a learning disability that has become more difficult to rein in.

Children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder are prone to a wide variety of issues all of which have been mentioned about your brother. While this isn’t meant to be a diagnosis; it is something I’d recommend you have a professional rule out for your brother. A good psychiatrist or clinical psychologist will know how to do the evaluation.

While ADHD may not be the diagnostic finding I think it begins the evaluation process. There are many other potential causes, each of which deserves to be considered and confirmed or ruled out.

The center for disease control had an extensive website on ADHD and special section on what they call other concerns and conditions that I encourage you to check out. Also, for treatment options, you can check out our own article here at PsychCentral.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Violent & Aggressive Brother

Therapists live, online right now, from BetterHelp:

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2019). Violent & Aggressive Brother. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 3, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 22 Oct 2019 (Originally: 25 Oct 2019)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 22 Oct 2019
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