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I Think My Brother Might Have Some Issues Because When Gets Angry He Talks Like a Crazy Person

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Often when my brother doesn’t get his way or he encounters a minor inconvenience, he enters an argument with my parents, typically my mother, in which he gets very angry and starts yelling and usually ends up crying at the end of the argument. This happens at least 1-3 times a month, but today’s argument had me thinking maybe he needs help. My brother entered an argument with our mother about his part time cashier job, in which he became hysterical, angry, yelling, and twisting our words against us. He claims he would like to leave work because it is a 15-minute drive away, doesn’t have time for schoolwork, can’t socialize, and makes below minimum wage (which is not true, because he makes $12 which is above federal and NJ minimum wage). My mom and I countered that his lazy friends are giving him these bad ideas to quick working, to which he reacted wildly to. He went off on a whole hysterical spiel, that we didn’t know what was best for him, didn’t know anything about his life, and things of that nature. My mom so much as thinks that he was on drugs because of how hysterical he was. Also, he has never complained about work to me or my parents, so him saying he wants to quit makes no sense to my mother and I, unless his friends know about this and are being a bad influence to him. Fortunately he does not get violent, but his words during these arguments are downright verbal abuse. He calls me various obscenities. He could be manipulating us to get his way, or does he need some kind of psychological help? Is there such a thing as a disorder in which someone gets hysterically angry during arguments, lies to you, and tries to manipulate you? Or is my brother just a plain disrespectful brat? My brother and I are both 16 right now, and I first noticed this problem around a year ago. Any help would be much appreciated, I just need some direction by an expert.

I Think My Brother Might Have Some Issues Because When Gets Angry He Talks Like a Crazy Person

Answered by on -

A.

It’s impossible to know what is wrong with your brother without having interviewed him professionally. Diagnosis over the internet is impossible. Ideally, he should be interviewed by a professional.

His behaviors are concerning. Your mother suspects drug use and that is a possibility. Some parents opt to drug test their children, but that may or may not be a good idea in this situation. The validity of those tests would have to be thoroughly vetted.

You noticed this change about a year ago. Try to think about what was happening at the time. Perhaps something changed. Perhaps that’s when he began hanging out with certain friends. It would be interesting to know more about his friends. Do they use drugs? Does he mimic their behavior? How do they treat their parents? How much time does he spend with them? Is he worse after spending time with them? Knowing the answers to those questions could help to determine if they are part of the problem.

He seems to treat you and your mother with disrespect. It would be interesting to know how he treats other people. What about his father? Does he treat him (assuming he is part of his life) with the same level of disrespect? Is there anyone whom he treats kindly?

He might treat certain people with disrespect because he feels that he can get away with it. He may feel empowered to manipulate you and your mother because he feels there will be no penalty for having done so.

He should be evaluated by a mental health professional. Your mother can make an appointment for him. She should consider choosing a therapist who specializes in working with adolescent males. She may also want to consider family therapy because his behavior is affecting the whole family. Sometimes people choose to undergo both individual and family counseling simultaneously. After a thorough evaluation, the therapist will determine the best course of action. That is the first step.

When your brother becomes upset, try not to fight with him. Understandably, that’s easier said than done. It’s not that you shouldn’t defend yourself. It’s simply that you want to do everything in your power not to make the situation worse. If your brother is experiencing mental health problems, you would not want to contribute to the chaos.

A mental health professional will know how to help and what to do. That’s the best way to handle this situation. Please take care.

Dr. Kristina Randle

I Think My Brother Might Have Some Issues Because When Gets Angry He Talks Like a Crazy Person

Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW

Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and Assistant Professor of Social Work and Forensics with extensive experience in the field of mental health. She works in private practice with adults, adolescents and families. Kristina has worked in a large array of settings including community mental health, college counseling and university research centers.

APA Reference
Randle, K. (2019). I Think My Brother Might Have Some Issues Because When Gets Angry He Talks Like a Crazy Person. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 22, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2019/10/21/i-think-my-brother-might-have-some-issues-because-when-gets-angry-he-talks-like-a-crazy-person/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 20 Oct 2019 (Originally: 21 Oct 2019)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 20 Oct 2019
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.