Thanks for taking the time to write to us about your concerns. I think it is important to begin with an understanding of what the difference is between psychopath and sociopath, and then move on to understanding normal teenage thinking. I have written about this in the past, but want to include it here as I believe it is very important in answering your question.
To begin with, there is no actual diagnosis in the official Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM V) that offers a classification for either “psychopath” or “sociopath.” There are many terms like this that are used in the popular press but do not have an official diagnostic category. Terms like “codependency” are like this as well. They may have common usage, but not used for diagnostic purposes. So understanding the difference between the two terms will involve the official labels and the expert’s opinion.
The official diagnostic term for psychopath and sociopath is Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD) that includes a pattern of symptoms often beginning around age 15 or older that include many of these symptoms:
- Failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest
- Deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure
- Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead
- Irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults
- Reckless disregard for the safety of self or others
- Consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations
- Lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another
Most clinical experts on the subject believe those identified as a psychopath or sociopath share some of the above characteristics. The most profound characteristic is that of a profoundly poor sense of right and wrong with little empathy or remorse for other people’s feelings. In other words, one major difference is the degree to which they have a conscience. A psychopath doesn’t, although there is a good chance he will pretend to. A sociopath has a conscience, but this conscience is not strong enough to stop the behavior. They may know that something is wrong but not be able to hold back from doing the behavior. What’s important here is that the behavior may look identical, but the degree to which they might feel bad about it would differ.
Both will steal your money: the sociopath would know that that was the wrong thing to do. The psychopath wouldn’t know and if they did they wouldn’t care. They are also more likely to be charming, intelligent and able to mimic emotions to get over on people. Sociopaths don’t typically have this finesse. They are blunt about being self-serving and are quick to blame others for their behavior. Psychopaths get calm under stress which helps them not fear the consequences of their actions: sociopaths less so.
The balance and tipping point is the degree to which someone with an antisocial personality disorder has empathy. While both lake the usual doses of empathic awareness for others, the psychopath doesn’t have the ability to understand how someone else feels. Other are simply pawns used for personal gains—not individuals with feelings that can be hurt.
About two-thirds of individuals with ASPD are men, and while Hollywood loves to portray them as vicious and violent, the vast majority are not. Manipulative, reckless, and uncaring, but not necessarily violent. Mean, selfish, narcissistic people may be tempting to be labeled as ASPD, yet these inconsiderate traits are not enough to get the diagnosis.
All this having been said the more likely thing is that you are having very normal, very common adolescent thoughts. You list your age as 14 and during this time there is a high degree of self-concerns, meaning it is very typical for the focus to be on one’s self and uniqueness. Classically, seeing one’s self as different from everyone else comes with this phase of development. This is the time teenagers break away from parents and convention and try to figure out their identity and are more concerned about understanding their special gifts and talents than the concerns of others.
What you’ve identified in your email sounds like the normal process of maturing rather than pathology. My encouragement is for you to figure out what your strengths are and learn more about using them to develop those skill that will be important in your life for success.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral