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I Want to Move Back to My Ex But My Family Won’t Let Me

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So I want to get back with my daughter’s father. We broke up originally because I cheated which was my mistake. Please, no bashing I suffered enough already. Point what I am getting to is I moved 1000kms away from him because of the fights and accusations and threats that was happening. So I moved to my parents it has been One and a Half months since the fights we both want to get back together and his family wants me home too, as I was living with him for almost a year. Now that we have sorted things out through numerous phone calls and text messages we have decided to leave the past behind us, but my parents don’t want to leave it there, they keep saying that everyone is going to try to take my child away from me because I’m “mentally unstable” truth of the matter is I have anger issues and when I get angry it gets ugly. But my parents refuse to let me go back home to my daughter’s father and we want to get back together I need some advice on how to go about everything. (From South Africa)

I Want to Move Back to My Ex But My Family Won’t Let Me

Answered by on -

A.

Wanting to move back isn’t enough. Other than feeling bad and wanting to go back, what have you done to change? Anger management takes work, and saying you are going to put it behind you without developing any tools to keep it behind you isn’t likely to work. You need tools, you need strategies for coping, and learning how to prevent something else, like another affair when you get angry, from happening again.

Since your parents have offered to take you in with your daughter take this time to get some therapy and learn how to manage your emotions. Once you’ve taken care of this moving back will be easier — and more likely to work.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

I Want to Move Back to My Ex But My Family Won’t Let Me

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2019). I Want to Move Back to My Ex But My Family Won’t Let Me. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 17, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2019/04/17/i-want-to-move-back-to-my-ex-but-my-family-wont-let-me/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 13 Apr 2019
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 13 Apr 2019
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