Let him know that you have reached your limit and are filing for divorce. This will let him know you have reached a limit and that his behavior isn’t tolerable. Maybe he’s depressed, maybe he’s having an affair, maybe he regrets getting married, maybe he’s homesick. Whatever it is he isn’t being a reliable, loving spouse and, unless there is a radical change on his part the marriage, isn’t viable. Often, taking a clear stand and setting a boundary about what is and isn’t tolerable can be a wake-up call. The simple facts are this is his issue and he isn’t dealing with it. Let him know that you wish things were different, but since he isn’t trying to change his behavior you are going to have to file for a divorce.
Finally, I’d then let him know you are going to make an appointment with a therapist and would like him to come. Give him the time and the date and go. If he shows—great. This can be a clear conversation about your disappointments. If he doesn’t show begin individual therapy to help you make the break. Him not showing will be a clear sign for you to move on. It is not your job to take care of him, rather it is time to take very good care of yourself. The find help tab at the top of the page can help you find someone in your area.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral