My husband had a 5-year affair. I found out and left him for 2 months. He came back asking for forgiveness and said he’s in love with me and wants nothing to do with her…he blocked her from all he could but she kept making fake accounts online and calling n different number she has never stopped. Just found out he’s back on Facebook and she is following him and liking, loving, and comments on all his posts…he refuses to block her and has now made all posts public… anything I say about itor her he gets offensive and upset and blames me for everything…I can not say anything to her or about her without him getting angry…he says he’s not communicating with her but will not block her and has locked his phone…is the his way of controlling me or hurting me ? Does he want her more? He says he loves me but will not do anything to remove her from our life…she has said and caused so much emotional distress on me even fakeing a pregnancy which just about killed me inside…what should I do?
Your husband says one thing but does another. He’s seems to be having some type of relationship with this woman and doesn’t want you to know about it or to stop it. Unless you are okay with his behavior and don’t mind how he treats you, separation or divorce may be in your best interest.
This woman is not necessarily the problem. You do not know her. It’s your husband who’s the problem. He’s the one who promised to love and cherish you, until death do you part. He is the one who has broken the trust. It would not help to have any interaction with the other woman. It is your husband who has broken the trust, who has lied and who has betrayed you.
I would strongly recommend counseling You may also need to consult a lawyer depending upon your decision. Thanks for your question. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle
Getting Over Husband’s Affair
Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW
Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and Assistant Professor of Social Work and Forensics with extensive experience in the field of mental health. She works in private practice with adults, adolescents and families. Kristina has worked in a large array of settings including community mental health, college counseling and university research centers.
APA Reference Randle, K. (2019). Getting Over Husband’s Affair. Psych Central.
Retrieved on December 5, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2019/02/25/getting-over-husbands-affair/
Last updated: 22 Feb 2019 (Originally: 25 Feb 2019) Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 22 Feb 2019 Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.