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Losing All Feelings/Interest After Partner Doing Something I Want Them to Do

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I’ve been in and out of many rather quick relationships my whole life, never one that exceeds 5 months. Every time it ends the same way; They will do the thing I wish for them to do the most for me Sex, favors, or carving my name into their body etc., Things that make them prove their love for me, I lose all interest in them directly after they do these things, most of the time I will develop strong feelings of disgust, boredom, or contempt towards them despite the partner doing nothing wrong or that I dislike but the opposite. I remove them from my life fully and forever as soon as I get the opportunity to. I will remove them from my life by lying, humiliating, or exposing them. This isn’t causing me any emotional stress but I’m curious about if this is a common behavior issue with ADHD, I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD since age 6 and my symptoms haven’t lessened since then. I don’t see this as a great issue just a risk of me getting hurt by one of the partners relatives. Some people who I speak to as friends tell me that this is very wrong to do so I understand that, but I only care about whether or not there’s a risk of me being hurt as a result of it.

Losing All Feelings/Interest After Partner Doing Something I Want Them to Do

Answered by on -

A.

Your friends are correct. What you are doing is wrong. What you described is not consistent with ADHD. It’s abusive and, depending upon what you’ve made people do to “prove their love” for you, possibly illegal.

As you stated in your letter, you only care about whether your behavior might result in you being hurt. In other words, you only care about yourself.

If you engage in illegal behavior, you could be arrested and imprisoned. If you hurt someone, they might retaliate. As you mentioned, perhaps one of their relatives will seek revenge upon you. Undoubtably, your behavior is risky and you stand to be harmed should you continue this way of life.

I should also mention that intentionally harming people is considered by some to be a form of evil. Since you are worried about the repercussions of your behavior, you should seek help. It’s not advantageous to engage in risky behavior that could have a negative impact upon you. It’s in one’s best interest to avoid self-harm. Treatment might prevent you from future suffering and, by extension, also stop the suffering of others. Please take care.

Dr. Kristina Randle

Losing All Feelings/Interest After Partner Doing Something I Want Them to Do

Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW

Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and Assistant Professor of Social Work and Forensics with extensive experience in the field of mental health. She works in private practice with adults, adolescents and families. Kristina has worked in a large array of settings including community mental health, college counseling and university research centers.

APA Reference
Randle, K. (2019). Losing All Feelings/Interest After Partner Doing Something I Want Them to Do. Psych Central. Retrieved on July 19, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2019/02/23/losing-all-feelings-interest-after-partner-doing-something-i-want-them-to-do/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 21 Feb 2019
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 21 Feb 2019
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.