I don’t have enough information to determine her motivations. To date, your boyfriend has been unwilling to stand up to his family. They seem to rule his life. Unless he takes a stand with them, nothing will likely change.
In all likelihood, his “talking” to them won’t help. His goal may be trying to convince them to stop what they’re doing. It’s unlikely that they will change unless he changes his behavior towards them. Talking to them may not be enough.
Unless you are satisfied with the status quo, be cautious about this relationship. If he is unwilling to stand up to his family, then they will continue to be dominate his life. By not standing up for himself, he is reinforcing their behavior. If you don’t like the way he interacts with his family, and he is unwilling to change, then this may not be the relationship for you.
You might try couples counseling. Perhaps that could help. If he’s unwilling, individual counseling could assist you in determining how to move forward in this relationship. Good luck and please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle