I realize that this has been asked before but my situation is different from the rest. When I was younger I was a pathological liar. I have been through three family divorces, I have severe depression, anxiety, and I have ADHD. I have loved the idea of the human body and how it works since I was little. When I would see animal corpses I wanted to take them apart and search them. I have been suicidal a lot. With this new divorce, I have come to hate the person my parent is divorcing. I hate them so much that I cannot be in the same room as them or hear their name without wanting to throw up. It has escalated to the point that I have constant violent thoughts when I hear or see them. These kinds of thoughts have spread to the people around me (like passers-by), meaning that I think about hurting them. I do not want to hurt them but at times I appreciate the thought…. I am afraid of therapists for some reason so I am afraid of asking for help. My parents are also having issues with money so I do not want to burden them.
I admire your perseverance and courage in managing these charged and difficult feelings. You have already shown a great deal of bravery by reaching out our group of PsychCentral therapists. Perhaps you are less afraid to ask for help than you think.
The university you are at has a counseling center that will offer low or no-cost therapy. I highly recommend you begin one-on-one counseling to start sorting through these feelings. Hating the person your mother is divorcing and displacing your anger onto others is something these counselors are trained to understand and help.
Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.
APA Reference Tomasulo, D. (2019). I Think that I’m Going Crazy. Psych Central.
Retrieved on October 23, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2019/02/13/i-think-that-im-going-crazy/
Last updated: 9 Feb 2019 Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 9 Feb 2019 Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.