I’m not certain if this is true in your country but in the United States, there are agencies where you can report harassment at work. One example is the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC). Many companies also have human resources departments where those reports can be made. If any of those options are available, utilize them. You should not have to tolerate harassment at work.
Given that you are “in a state of constant fear and anxiety,” it would seem that professional treatment is necessary. Ideally, you would have sought help sooner but I understand that is not always possible.
You mentioned that you can’t go to therapy but did not provide an explanation. Often people avoid seeking help because they feel shame about having to ask for help. Money and lack of options are also common reasons. I can only speculate because you didn’t elaborate further.
Depression and anxiety can worsen when they are ignored. They usually don’t go away without treatment. Do everything in your power to seek treatment and you will quickly see how much it can help. Please write again if you have additional questions. Good luck and please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle