It is time to leave. See your dad on your birthday, and stop being in orbit around a mother who makes bad choices, doesn’t protect you, and you feel so unsafe with that you can’t even share your emotional struggles with.
Your mom has made her choices — don’t let them be yours. Right now taking care of yourself, going to work or school and starting your journey is the best thing you can do for you — and for her. While you are there she has to deal with her husband, who is in a bad mood. Once you are out you can be free to carve out a life with meaning that doesn’t include having to put up with watching him treat your mother so badly.
Ask for help from other family members or a woman’s center. They can help you get resources to move on with your life. Put your energy into taking care of you first.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral