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Confused on My Sexual Tendencies and Feelings

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I know for a fact that I am sexually attracted to women and in no way attracted to men. That being said I often have strong sexual thoughts about wanting to physically be a woman and being lesbian. I have struggled with depression for 4 years now which is beside the point. The reason I bring this up is because recently I have had increasing urges to dress in women’s clothing, especially when aroused. During these times I’m happier than I normally am and I enjoy how I feel in women’s clothes and imagining I have female attributes. This is very confusing for me because before recently I had never had such strong images and desires to be more feminine. What does this mean for me? Is this something that I should explore more or is it just some kind of kink or phase of a sort? I’m having trouble determining for myself.

Confused on My Sexual Tendencies and Feelings

Answered by on -


This is something worth exploring and is best done through finding an expert in sexuality to guide you through it. The fact that the desire to cross-dress concerns you is enough to go have a chat with someone who specializes. This will give you the opportunity to ask questions and get answers that can help you understand more about these urges. Check the Find Help tab at the top of this page.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Confused on My Sexual Tendencies and Feelings

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Confused on My Sexual Tendencies and Feelings. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 23, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 29 Jul 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 29 Jul 2018
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