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How My Boyfriend Treats My Son

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Me and my boyfriend have been together for 6 years now. He lives with me. Sometimes he is very cold to my son. He is a quiet guy that does not really like to be bothered. He gets annoyed with me too when I bug him. He has said that he is the type of guy that shouldn’t be in a relationship because he likes his space. Well, last night was the last straw for me. My son had gotten him something for father’s day (not his dad) and he brought it over to his desk tried to talk to him and he said not right now and my son was yelling over him saying it’s important and my boyfriend yelled at him and he started crying and came and told me. I went in and talked to my boyfriend and he said it doesn’t matter what he needed to talk to me about he needs to wait. Then later my son came in again to apologize to him for bothering him and yelled at him again. I really think I’ve had it with this. I love my boyfriend and sometimes him and my son have lots of fun together, he’s been around since he was 2. He’s 8 now. But This happens too much and my son should not be treated this way. Am I making the right decision breaking up with him or should I talk to him and see if things change?

How My Boyfriend Treats My Son

Answered by on -

A.

A: Yes, it’s not worth having a boyfriend who doesn’t know how to respect your son. Since I don’t know the particulars (like if your boyfriend has children from a previous marriage or relationship, or if he has never been a parent), you could give him a chance to earn the right to be in a relationship with you and your son. This would requite the two of you to go to a marriage and family counselor to explain what the expectations are. If agrees to go, that’s a good start. If he doesn’t, it is a good indication you need to move on.

How My Boyfriend Treats My Son

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). How My Boyfriend Treats My Son. Psych Central. Retrieved on July 21, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2018/07/21/how-my-boyfriend-treats-my-son/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 19 Jul 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 19 Jul 2018
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.