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Is This Relationship Unhealthy?

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From the U.S.: I have been dating this guy for a year and I recently started thinking that maybe our relationship is unhealthy? When we first started dating he told me he loved me after a month and asked me to move in with him after about 4 months.

Before that he would tell me that he would kill me if I left him or cheated on him but I thought he was just playing around. Recently he’s been a little rough with me. Sometimes he’ll squeeze my arm really hard or yell at me in public. He tells me I have to obey him all the time and he doesn’t let me go anywhere without him. Yesterday he hit me on my mouth because I had interrupted him. It didn’t really hurt but I was really unnecessary . He was really nice and caring in the beginning but now he’s mean. Do you think those were possible red flags early on in the relationship

Is This Relationship Unhealthy?

Answered by on -


Run, don’t walk, away from this relationship. You do not deserve to be hit or hurt. He has no right to know your every move or to threaten you. His behavior is abusive and controlling. Yes, I know he can be nice. Abusers often are when they want to keep someone in their orbit. But the nice times don’t cancel out his controlling behavior. Get out before you get even more hurt.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

Is This Relationship Unhealthy?

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). Is This Relationship Unhealthy?. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 20, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 29 Jun 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 29 Jun 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.