I’ve lived with my aunt for over 6 years and the past 4 have been hell she yells at me constantly and sometimes hits me. When she does I just think and have to stop myself from acting but I just know that i could kill her. How do i stop the urges? I’ve made plans about killing her then myself but I always stop myself. How do I tell my close friends about this and what should I do? She isn’t the only person I’ve thought about killing, the other is my female friends adopted dad who touches her and says explicit stuff to her.
A. Throughout your life, you will encounter people you don’t like and who do bad things. Murder is not the solution. Research shows that it is not uncommon for people to have thought about killing, but most would never do it because of the severe consequences they would face.
If you were to kill your aunt or anyone else, you would be giving up your life. You could spend the rest your life in prison or even face the death penalty. Prison conditions are horrendous and that’s not a life you would want to live. In many prisons, people who commit murder are segregated and placed into solitary confinement. There’s a website called Solitary Watch where you can read letters from prisoners living in solitary confinement. They describe the awful experiences of isolation. Isolation causes severe psychological distress. People with no history of a mental illness describe how being in solitary has effectively driven them insane. Are you willing to give up your life of freedom? I believe that you would sincerely regret your actions should you decide to act on your urges.
If your aunt is harming you, you should call the authorities. Move out if you can. Don’t tolerate her abuse. Regarding one of your female friends whose adopted father is harming her, that information should also be reported to the authorities. They will investigate and arrest the offending party, if necessary. It is the job of law enforcement to deal with criminals, not yours. Laypersons don’t have the right to take legal matters into their own hands. It’s against the law and you will be punished.
I would avoid telling your close friends about your desire to kill. It would be better to share this information with a mental health professional. They will know how to help you. They can assist you in developing a plan for finding a different place to live. If your aunt is abusing you, they will call the authorities. I hope that you will consider my advice as it is the correct way to handle this situation. Taking matters into your own hands could lead to severe trouble and you want to do everything in your power to avoid that outcome. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle