Thank you for being able to confront this violent thought by talking about it here. What is important is that you noticed all three components of the experience. You knew the child’s crying was the trigger, the violent image followed it, and a detachment followed. Being able to notice this process is a big part of learning to correct it.
Talking about these thoughts with a professional is important. Letting your parents know that you are having trouble managing your anger, or letting your school counselor know how quickly you get angry and then shut down is the next step.
Trying to manage this without help can be difficult. Many people have angry thoughts and feelings — and counseling is a very good way to figure out how to manage them.
Reaching out to us was a very good first step. Letting others know is the next.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral