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My Mom Hinders My Education

My mom thinks I’m lazy, so to make me study they do tons of things – locking me out of the family Wi-Fi, confiscating my phone (which I paid half the price for) making threats, etc.
Due to the fact that all students have a smart phone, my teachers do loads of stuff over it. They give us instructions, inform us about events, remind us about stuff (which I really need because I’m a bit forgetful). We are also expected to use it to ask about our subjects and discuss our projects. I even use my phone as an alarm to wake up, to record down my homework and keep my timetable on it.

The day my mom confiscated my phone, I thought I had to go to school empty-handed until my dad passed it to me to check what I needed to do and bring. Just earlier today, I found out that my Physics teacher had asked us to watch a video, and guess how he told us that? Needless to say I couldn’t watch it.

I tried to ask my mom for the phone, and explained everything to her. Like the nice parent she is, she scolded me, said that I was lying, purposely not wanting to study, useless and should kill myself.
I’ll admit that maybe I was lazy before. But even if I want to work harder now, I can’t because my mom convinced herself that I am bad beyond hope, and refuse to trust me. And that’s what she tells everyone.
This isn’t the first time she was like this, and I fear it would get worse. She says that she doesn’t care about me anymore, but she does and in all the wrong ways. I wish she would just leave me be. It’s not like I need the most attention – my two younger siblings need it far more, but she never cares about them. If this continues, I doubt I’d have much of a future.
(Extra (possibly important) background info: My family’s monthly income is below average (earned mostly by my mom) my older sister studied during a time where phones weren’t as important, and my older brother passed in an accident.) (From Singapore)

My Mom Hinders My Education

A.

  I am sorry you are having so much trouble with your mom, and it is time to get your dad or someone from the school involved. Your mom is making decisions she thinks will help you but they are hurting you.

First, ask your dad for help. He seems to understand and can help you bargain with her. If that isn’t effective ask one of your teachers to write a note explaining that you need to see the homework request on your phone, so even if it is confiscated by your mom you should be able to check it out to get the work.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

My Mom Hinders My Education

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). My Mom Hinders My Education. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 12, 2018, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2018/02/14/my-mom-hinders-my-education/

 

Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 11 Feb 2018
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 11 Feb 2018
Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.