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Relationship Ending

Just Got out of a year long relationship with kids and potential pregnancies frowning what I’ve gathered I was cheated on for 3 months and was told she aborted her pregnancy (may or may not be true) and there was something with her and my dad talk about running away together and to sum it up I lost who I was/am and still love her and her kids. (From the USA)

Relationship Ending

A.

Whatever this is — it isn’t love. You were cheated on for 3 of the 12 months you were in the relationship, don’t trust that what she says, and are concerned that she is planning to run away with your father.

When someone treats you this poorly and you still feel attraction and desire you need to ask yourself some important questions. First, why hasn’t all this pain moved you away from her? Secondly, is your sense of what love is an unhealthy one?

When this kind of thing has happened people are drawn more to a person’s potential than their reality. They hang onto a relationship because of how they think it should be — not how it is. I believe this is happening with you, and I feel you would do well to ask yourself these questions. Some individual therapy can help and a local therapist is available at the “Find Help” tab at the top of the page.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Relationship Ending

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Relationship Ending. Psych Central. Retrieved on August 20, 2018, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2018/01/21/relationship-ending/

 

Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 20 Jan 2018
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 20 Jan 2018
Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.