From a young woman in Ireland: We have been together for 3 years and neither have us have ever cheated before we have always been so faithful and loved each other so much, I know that he had taken drugs before and I’m not ok with it so he has always hidden it from me ,
I seen a video of him dancing with another girl on snapchat, and he confessed to cheating on me with that girl the next day. He says it wasn’t him it was a ****ed up version of him and he regretted it instantly.
I always had total faith he would never cheat on me and I felt so safe with him , , I can’t believe he has done this I’m so shocked it hasn’t even hit me yet. What do I do ,
I don’t want to break up but I feel like we have to because I will never trust him again as he has lied to me about taking drugs and now he has cheated on me. He swears this is the first time and that he only kissed her but how can I believe him. I don’t know what to do I really don’t want to break up with him but I know that our relationship will never be th same as I firmly believe that once a cheat always a cheat.
Please help me I feel lost and so alone, I feel sick at the thought of what has happened and don’t know how to react. we are currently in a long distance relationship as he moved to liverpool about 3 months ago whilst i live in ireland, the plan was for me to move to liverpool in the summer. so therefore im oblivious to anything does unless he tells me , trust was so important and now its destroyed. the only thing i can think is if he has done it before, why did he tell me about it this time?
Please, don’t make any major life changes — like a move — unless and until your guy straightens out his life. He has “cheated” on you in more ways than one. Yes, he was unfaithful by cheating with the other girl. But he is also “cheating” by hiding his relationship with drugs. Yes, that is cheating, too.
This man is not the honest man you deserve. A relationship based in lies isn’t going anywhere.
I wish you well. Dr. Marie
My Boyfriend Cheats When He Is on Drugs
Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker
Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.
APA Reference Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). My Boyfriend Cheats When He Is on Drugs. Psych Central.
Retrieved on September 17, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2017/12/29/my-boyfriend-cheats-when-he-is-on-drugs/
Last updated: 8 May 2018 Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018 Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.