I know it sounds strange, but I honestly have always struggled with desires to start wearing incontinence products full time and to start identifying myself as incontinent whenever necessary. It may not be the healthiest of coping skills for my anxiety, but I have yet to find anything else that so dramatically lowers my anxiety than by wearing and using Depends. I’ve spent years struggling with this whole issue, but if anyone might be able to provide any type of encouragement, I would be grateful. (From the USA)

A:  There can be a wide variety of reasons this practice helps with your anxiety that range from the security felt as a child to the fear of incontinence. What is important to keep in mind is that you found something that works for you. Perhaps the reason why is uncertain, but you certainly are not along. Others have had such concerns and they struggle with the issue as well.

People cope with anxiety in a myriad of ways and the fact that you have found something that helps, isn’t self-destructive and doesn’t harm anyone is a plus.

Yet if it bothers you you may want to try some individual therapy to find out why it works. Sometimes this insight can lead to finding alternates that don’t cause you so much concern.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral