I have three really close friends. In March I met a guy who became my boyfriend. In May I started working on my Master’s. One of my friends was guilt tripping me so I stopped hanging out with her as much. Now, another friend is claiming that my boyfriend is the reason I’m not available anymore. She is trying to say I don’t know what happiness is and that I’m not actually happy. The thing is, that over the months, I have stopped letting these people walk all over me and dictate what I do and when I do it. They are blaming my boyfriend, claiming I’m cutting them out. I don’t want to lose my friends or my boyfriend and don’t know what to do.

A: Thank you for your email. Being in a new relationship can be stressful at times as it often requires a reorganization of priorities. It is not uncommon for people to struggle with this and it can be quite a juggling act to maintain old relationships and new relationships. It sounds as though you are in a transitory period in your life, which is definitely going to require reflection on your part. Exploring your feelings about your relationships will help you get a clearer picture of which of these relationships you feel are worth maintaining.

I recommend that you seek therapy which I believe will be highly beneficial to you as you navigate through this period. Having an objective, safe space will allow you to freely explore your thoughts, feelings and provide some insight about all of this. I wish you the best of luck.

Dr. Mimi