You don’t need his permission to label this as abuse. His verbal abuse has to do with his insecurity, immaturity, and lack of respect for you. This is about his shortcomings — not yours.
If this is the bottom line. If this is how he thinks of you when there is any kind of a conflict, then the real question isn’t how he can talk to you like this and think it’s okay — It is why you allow yourself to stay with him? You do not deserve to be punished for your past, but you are responsible for how you live your future. I’d let him know that if he berates you about your past that you will have to breakup with him. You don’t want to sell yourself short by having a family with a man who thinks so little of you.
If you do break up you’ll want to use some therapy to help with the transition.