I was raped by my father repeatedly as a young boy, between the ages of 7-12. I was forced to wear dresses even before that, and I have since been afraid of men. I have 5 sisters and they were always safe. It was only myself that this happened to. Right now, I dress whenever I can as a princess or any other kind of little girl dresses. And I actually feel and become an 8 year old girl. I lose all track of time and can’t remember everything after I return to myself. But I am the most happiest and content when I can be this little 8 year old girl. My real childhood was an absolute horror, and I don’t understand what is happening to me. It seems like I cannot control it at all. Nobody else knows about my problem, but I wish I could just stay in the that 8 year old girl’s body, and keep wearing dresses and just play games knowing that I would always feel safe and happy. I have other people in my mind that also take control sometimes. But the little girl is the boss, and I do whatever she says. What is wrong with me, and should I be concerned? Please help, any advice would be extremely grateful. Thank you. (From the USA)Likes to Be and Dress Like an 8-Year-Old Girl
I am so very sorry you have been exposed to such horrible abuse. As you list your age in the late 50s I would highly recommend talking to a psychiatrist or clinical psychologist who specializes in adults with childhood trauma.
The age and manner, as well as your reaction when you are dressing up can be tied directly to the ongoing incest. A qualified professional can help unravel what is happening, and suggest ways to help.