You are very stuck. You haven’t been able to find ways to solve your problems so you are left with anger that has no place to go. All you feel able to do is feel helpless and cry. That helps you get some of the anger out, but it doesn’t solve the problems.
You are 21. It’s time for you to get in charge of your own life. You are an adult. Whatever mistakes your parents made as parents are done. There is no point to blaming them or arguing with them anymore. As you already know, that goes nowhere. After you assign blame, you still have to figure out how to live your life.
First — your birthday. There is no reason not to celebrate your birthday when your friends come back home. Find a quiet way to privately celebrate yourself on the actual day. Then plan a party to celebrate your friends’ return and your birthday in the fall. There are never too many reasons to have a party.
Then — it’s up to you to make good memories. No one can do it for you. Get involved with activities where you will meet more people who like to do things you like to do. If you aren’t sure what would make you happy, join in a number of activities to explore them.
I think you will feel better if you start taking positive steps to get out of the stuck place. If you do take some steps and you still cry every day, then you should see a doctor to make sure there isn’t something amiss physically. Sometimes things like a thyroid condition make a person hypersensitive. If you are physically fine and are still so distressed, I urge you to find a counselor to give you the support you may need to take charge of your life.
I wish you well,