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Son Wearing Mom’s Underwear

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I recently found some of my sexiest bras and panties in my son’s bed.  He is 7 years old and a typical “all boy” kind of kid.  He also had a swimsuit magazine in there too.  I know he was hiding them and after conversations with him he admits he has put them on a few times.  I also found heels and a scarf.  What explanations might there be?  He’s having a hard time articulating to me and his dad about this.  Is it normal curiosity?  Other issues? (From the USA)

Son Wearing Mom’s Underwear

Answered by on -


There is a very wide range of what is normal, and before I would get too concerned I would honor the process you have begun by starting the conversation with him. It is too hard to tell from the information you have given, but I would encourage his dad to increase time he spends and talks with him. I wouldn’t interrogate, or somehow make him feel he is bad or wrong, but try to develop more connection, discussion, and activities together. Don’t overdo this, but just be more available and talk about what is going on in his life.

See how that works. If the behavior changes one way or another then you know the talking is either increasing or decreasing his anxiety. If it looks like he is getting more anxious about it I would take hi to a child clinical psychologist for a chat. This is something he or she will be able to evaluate and give you feedback on.

But I would begin by talking more to him about his day-to-day concerns.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Son Wearing Mom’s Underwear

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Son Wearing Mom’s Underwear. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 20, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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