Part of the problem could be that you are choosing the wrong partners. Maybe they were not a match. In that case, ending those relationships would have been the right thing to do.
Alternatively, your untreated anxiety and depression may be negatively impacting your relationships. Untreated mental health problems are not something that can be compartmentalized. They bleed into all aspects of life. Your depression and anxiety may be making it difficult for you to have a healthy relationship.
A relationship is not going to fix this problem. The solution is counseling. You are an ideal candidate. These are exactly the types of problems that bring people into therapy.
Once you begin to address the problems, that seem to have plagued you since childhood, you might find that your relationships improve. Ask your primary care physician for a referral or call the one 800 number on the back of your insurance card. They can help you find a local therapist who can help. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle