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Home » Ask the Therapist » I Want to Understand and Know What’s Going on with Me

I Want to Understand and Know What’s Going on with Me

Asked by on with 1 answer:

Hi – i am from India for years i have been going through issues and i have been having breakdowns and i dont know what wrong with me. its been years since i actually sat and studied i want to fix things.

i have been to a therapist but she never tells me what is wrong with me and she focuses on doing exercises or give advice. someone even said i am making excuses and making a fool out myself.

i am not able to follow the exercises and i want to know whether i am depressed or having anxiety issues or anything else and i want to know the root cause of why am i like this before i proceed to make changes as i feel having an understanding will help me gain control slowly is this right can i actually do that ?????

I Want to Understand and Know What’s Going on with Me

Answered by on -

A.

You and your therapist are not in agreement about the best way to help you. She doesn’t want to get bogged down in the whys. You don’t want to follow her advice unless you have a better understanding of the “cause”. For some reason (probably a good one), the argument has become more important to you than getting on with getting better. It may be, for example, that new issues will emerge that are even more worrisome if you are successful with your studies. Talk with your therapist about whether if is safe for you to change.

Do work with your therapist to look at why you are arguing with each other and to come to agreement about how to proceed. As long as the two of you are in an argument (even if it is a polite one), your therapy will not progress.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

I Want to Understand and Know What’s Going on with Me

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). I Want to Understand and Know What’s Going on with Me. Psych Central. Retrieved on July 19, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2017/05/22/i-want-to-understand-and-know-whats-going-on-with-me/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.