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I Don’t Know Who I Am

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From a preteen the UK: I really don’t know who I am anymore. I’ve switched through so many interests and beliefs I don’t even know which ones make up me as a person anymore. I’m very paranoid at what I appear like to other people and what they think of me so it almost feels like I’m ‘building’ a personality to ‘experiment’ what other people think of it over and over again. I also struggle with my name and gender identity and I already have BPD, PPD and ASD as well as anxiety.

I Don’t Know Who I Am

Answered by on -


Of course you don’t know who you are yet. You are 12! The teen years are an important period of time for self-discovery.

I don’t know who gave you all those diagnoses but unless it was a professional, please take care about how much credibility you give them. All teenagers have what can look like personality disorders. All teenagers have some level of anxiety about how others see them. All teens go through periods of what can look like depression.

If that weren’t enough, many teens these days aren’t getting enough sleep which makes everything seem much worse — and can create further anxiety and depression.

Please understand that saying all this is not intended to minimize your concerns. But I do want you to know that your “symptoms” seem normal to me. But I only have a short letter to go by. If my reassurance doesn’t reassure you, please do see a licensed therapist who can really get to know you and offer some advice.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

I Don’t Know Who I Am

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). I Don’t Know Who I Am. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 22, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.