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Do I Have Stockholm Syndrome?

Hello, I am a seventeen-year-old girl that is from cali, usa. I think I may have Stockholm syndrome, or something like that.

So, my cousin and I always had this…weird relationship. we can’t stand each other but we love (?) each other. yeah, it’s incest. and he has antisocial personality disorder and I’ve depression, inferiority complex, GAD, PTSD, dyslexia and ADHD.

See, he has always made advancements towards me, some people say before I can even remember (he is two years older than me). he even tried to kiss me when I was eight years old during my grandfather’s funeral. and, the thing was, I was okay with it…which disturbs me. luckily somebody found us and stopped it before it was too late.

Then, when I was ten, he started to stalk me, stole my things and burned some of them, tried to contact the devil to make a contract for my love, tried to sneak a peek whenever I took showers (which is why I’m scared of them now), and looked at me while I slept. sometimes he even climbed into my bed. sometimes he tried to grope me or take my pants off. I used to not be able to wear anything without a belt. yet, even after all of this, I still feel this strange love. I even tried to get the police involved.

Yeah to say our relationship is complicated is an understatement. because, yeah, he loves me in a sick way. and I love him in a sick way. yet I still want revenge. is this Stockholm syndrome or something else? I don’t exactly hate authority. I just want to get out of this relationship even though I love him.

Do I Have Stockholm Syndrome?

A.

I am sorry that this has happened to you and I’d like to challenge what you are calling strange love. It isn’t love — not at all. I am not challenging your feelings because I understand the confusion. You didn’t have a choice in who your sexual partner was going to be, did not want it to the point of having the police involved. This is about sexual abuse and the resulting reactions that happen. He did something to you at an age where you should have been protected from him. Feeling bad for him, wanting his attention, and being confused about all of this isn’t a healthy love. It is often some of the complex feelings involved after abuse.

I believe some individual therapy would be good for you to engage in as it can help you sort through these feelings of “strange love” and revenge. The find help tab at the top of the page can help you find someone in your area.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Do I Have Stockholm Syndrome?

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2017). Do I Have Stockholm Syndrome?. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 14, 2018, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2017/04/08/do-i-have-stockholm-syndrome/

 

Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 2 Apr 2017
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 2 Apr 2017
Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.