Approximately 6 years ago, I started to believe in God. I am very studious, so please don’t consider me an average believer. Anyhow God bestowed upon me success in the form of health, reputation and education. I disobeyed Him and He took it all back, also He made my life very fragile in numerous ways. One of the worst punishment He gave me was that He stopped my growth. Now before you think “It’s all in the genes” well it’s not, my parents have an average height and according to my doctor I should have been average too but sadly I stopped growing without any explanation. Now to my real problem, I have a self esteem issue in which when walking on the streets I feel tiny (especially in front of women). This is deemed normal for people like me. Mentally speaking, I feel worthless and feel extraordinarily detached from this world (I see the world from space!). My social skills are deteriorating day by day. I used to be an excellent man once but now I am nothing!
People used to love me, respect me, and know me. But now no one even looks at me (maybe I am not in there view :). Listen, 6 years ago I used to communicate with God, I was able to sense the unexplained good around me. It was like I was an angel. But now I feel Cursed, I feel like Lucifer or Iblees. I hope you understand my situation and will respond to help. Best Regards! Thank you! (From Canada)Lack of Self Esteem and Emotional Balance
Lack of Self Esteem and Emotional Balance
While there are several ways to discuss you concerns from a psychological perspective, I am going to view this as a spiritual rather than psychological crisis. It is important to make this distinction because the approach to correcting it is different.
You have identified your age as 20, and that means that the issues that caused you to feel shift with God happened when you were 14. Whatever the transgression was that you feel God is punishing you for by stunting your growth happened as a teenager. You are now an adult and I would seek religious counsel that can help you find a way to ask for God’s compassion in helping you restore your connection with Him.