From a teen in the U.S.: I don’t know if I’m delusional or a genius. I go through these stages where I have these weird thoughts. Like a few days ago, I convinced myself I was bipolar even though I’ve never had a manic episode or anything close, but I thought I had. I also convinced myself I was autistic, had OCD, and was schizophrenic, schizotypal or schizoid. Now I’m convinced I’m delusional. But that could just be a delusional? But then if it was a delusion I wouldn’t be delusional. It just has my mind in such a twist.
I think so much. I used to have all these weird thoughts about the government poisoning my water, chakras, conspiracies, so many things. I don’t believe those things quite as much now. I was convinced Michael Jackson was alive and in disguise. I was convinced astrology was real, and I thought everyone’s birth chart unlocked a deep part of them. I was so sure.
I don’t believe that anymore but I still get into instances when I do. I think I’m special a lot. I actually know I’m special but won’t tell anyone cause they’ll think I’m narcissistic. I watch these people with schizophrenia and see myself in them, in some weird way. I think that schizophrenics have a secret knowledge about the world and that drugs make them dumber.
I lied about my age and location cause I don’t want people to find me on here. I just got afraid that you’d figure out who I am and call the psych ward in my location. I know that’s irrational, but I thought it for a split second. I’m also afraid of anyone finding my account on here. I don’t know if I’m paranoid or imagining that I’m paranoid which makes me paranoid. I dissociate a lot. I can make myself dissociate by just thinking about it.
What do you think? Am I crazy?